


Tumblr 1000 Followers Drabbles

by Xiubaek13 (slavetotheking)



Category: Big Bang (Band), EXO (Band), Monsta X (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Airplane Sex, Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Alternate Universe - Bakery, Alternate Universe - Circus, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Dance, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Library, Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Pirate, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Alternate Universe - Tattoo Parlor, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Alternate Universe - Witchcraft, Alternate universe - Mafia, Angst, Bartenders, CEO, Camping, Con Artists, Cyborgs, Doctor/Patient, Domestic Fluff, Drabble Collection, F/M, Fallen Angels, First Dates, Fluff, Smut, trapped in a room
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-14
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-03-04 17:53:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 41,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13370049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slavetotheking/pseuds/Xiubaek13
Summary: I held a drabble game on Tumblr for reaching 1000 followers. I have 25 in total to complete so this will be updated as I post them. I tried to do a different AU for each drabble to see what I could write.





	1. Drunk Yixing

Prompt: Yixing + “I’m too sober for this.” + “It’s only one night, we’ll just share the bed.”

Setting/AU: Dance club

Warnings: Alcohol, nothing else really.

Word Count: 1127

 

You couldn’t remember why you’d agreed to this. You hated clubs, you hated crowds and most of all you hated drunk men and yet somehow Yixing had convinced you to come to a club with him. If it had been anyone else you would have bluntly told them no, but your mind clouded when it came to Yixing. You’d been friends for so many years and he’d always been there for you through all of the shitty breakups, all of your exam freak outs and all of the best times so when he’d called to let you know that he needed you to meet him at a club you found the words no disappearing from your vocabulary.

 

Bodies writhed against each other as the loud music pumped through the club and you scanned the crowd for him. Surprisingly you didn’t find him on the dance floor which meant he was probably at the bar…a thought that caused you some concern.

 

Yixing was a great guy but he was a lightweight when it came to alcohol and the kind of drunk he turned into depended on his mood when he started drinking. If he was in a good mood you’d get the overly touchy, giggle fit, playful Yixing but if he was in a bad mood you’d be met with a grouchy, rude and fuckboy Yixing. You weren’t really in the mood for either, you’d much rather sit and talk in your apartment or somewhere with less than 500 sweaty drunk people out for sex and debauchery.

 

Not to say that you’d never thought ‘what if?’ when it came to Yixing. There was no denying that he was incredibly handsome and you’d seen the guy dance. You knew his talent there would be useful in other more intimate settings but you consistently pushed it aside. Yixing was your friend and he only ever hit on you when he was incredibly drunk and if you were going to sleep with him why would you waste it on drunk, sloppy sex when you were sure he was capable of blowing your mind.

 

On your third scan of the club you finally spotted him. He was sitting at the end of the bar hunched over. Bad mood then. You squared your shoulders and approached him, careful not to startle him, something that was easier said than done since the club was so loud and here were so many people.

 

“Xing!” you half shouted as you approached. He lifted his head and turned slightly, glancing back at you before turning back to nurse his beer.

 

“Oh good, you finally decided to show up. I guess you do care.” He spat out.

 

Definitely bad mood. “Xing, I’ve been here for an hour. I just couldn’t find you - it’s really packed if you hadn’t noticed. And I texted you like 5 times but you never answered.”

 

“Ah. I left my phone at home. Figured you’d find me and then I wouldn’t need it anyway.” He took a swig from the bottle in his hand and continued to stare blankly ahead. He looked worse than you’d seen him in months. He hadn’t been like this since she left him six months ago.

 

“What happened?” you asked.

 

“What do you mean?” He didn’t even look at you as he responded. In fact, he hadn’t looked at you apart from that quick glance as you’d walked up to the bar.

 

“Xing why the fuck am I at a club? Why did you drag me out here?” You snapped.

 

“I worry about you, cooped up inside that apartment of yours. I drop off to sleep wondering when the last time you actually experienced the cesspool that is nightlife. Plus they have cheap beer and I hate drinking alone.” He chuckled lowly, sparing a glance in your direction.

 

“You know what I mean. You haven’t been like this in months. What’s put you in this mood?”

 

He sighed deeply. “I’m too sober for this.”

 

The two of you sat at the bar and drank, Yixing having far more than you, and chatted. You’d finally gotten to the bottom of his mood. He’d been sent a wedding invitation from his ex. His ex who left him six months ago. You could have killed the bitch when he told you that. She knew how heartbroken he’d been when she left him and this was just the final nail in her coffin for you. Yixing didn’t want to talk about it. He would deflect your questions by either trying to find you a guy to take you home for a good fuck or by trying to make you angry with lewd questions. You asked if he’d spoken to her since she left and he responded with “Do you know how good you’d look bent over furniture?”

 

It was clear to you that he was just going to stay at the club and drink until he lost consciousness so you made the executive decision, with the help of the barkeep, to get him outside and to take him home.  

 

You stumbled as you tried to walk towards your apartment block. Yixing had rested most of his weight on you since he was too far gone to stand on his own. Your shoulder was killing you but you were trying to ignore it until you got home. You just had to get him there and set him up on your couch then you could go shower and go to bed and deal with his hangover in the morning.

 

Even though he’d been in a bad mood, he’d intensified every innuendo with little touches here and there, fingers tracing circles on your thigh, pulling you closer to him by your hip, slapping your ass and at his most brazen, licking your fingers. You’d decided he could afford to be a lot more sober than he was right now.

 

Sadly when you finally got to your apartment you found your housemate’s brother passed out of the couch. You silently cursed the universe and your housemate for this massive inconvenience. Sharing a bed with sober Yixing? Not a problem. Sharing a bed with drunk Yixing? Rife with potential problems. Especially since he’d been so touchy and brazen with remarks tonight. You hated that his words had affected you but you were not about to let him think he could just have you that easily. Yixing drunkenly chucked beside you. “Looks like you really do have to take me to bed.”

 

“Xing, I’m not -” You blushed.

 

“Relax doll, it’s only one night, we’ll just share the bed.” He smirked at you and winked. “What’s the worst that could happen?”


	2. Camping Sucks

Prompt: TOP + “I hate you.” “Why? I’m a delight.” + “Why do people keep trying to put a blanket on me?”

Setting/AU: Camping in the woods

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1308

 

Go camping they said. It’ll be fun they said. Clearly those people had never been camping with TOP. If they had, they’d know that a camping trip with him was like a divine punishment sent by God himself just to test you. Sure, TOP thought the idea was great. He’d been ‘camping’ with Big Bang when they filmed their little special for Youtube Red but he didn’t realise that there would just be a small group of 10 of you, none of you staff specifically employed to look after him and keep him out of trouble. No, this trip required him to do things for himself and you sure as shit weren’t going to let him off easy.

 

When you’d all arrived at the campsite you paired off to ensure an even delegation was done for setting up the site, cleaning, cooking, entertainment, putting up the tents & making the fire. Somehow you had ended up as TOP’s partner, all hopes of getting paired with your crush flying out the window. “You will put some work in or so help me, I will leave you in this forest.” He hadn’t taken your threat seriously, instead laughing at you and telling you that you’re cute when you’re angry. You were stubborn and you were not going to let him shirk on his responsibilities just because he never had to do some of these tasks before. What, did he think everyone else was a pro at putting up a tent? Unfortunately for you, he was just as, if not more, stubborn that you were so as soon as the first mentioning of collecting firewood and putting up tents occurred TOP disappeared.

 

Several hours and many failed attempts at putting up your tent later he finally appeared. He either didn’t notice how pissed you were or he simply didn’t care because the first words out of his mouth were “How have you still not got the tent up?”

 

You turned towards him, seething. “Oh I don’t know TOP. Maybe because it’s a TWO PERSON JOB, maybe because I had to do everything else since you disappeared at the first sign of work!”

 

“Christ, calm down. You’ll pull something.” He deadpanned.

 

“WHERE DID YOU EVEN GO FOR THIS WHOLE TIME?” You yelled. You were livid. You had been struggling with all of the tasks that had been designed for two people since TOP had seemingly decided to wander off into the forest to do fuck knows what and now that he was finally back, with no explanation for where he’d been, no apology for leaving you to do all of the work, no offer to help since you were clearly struggling and above all, the fact that he had the ball to ask why the tent still wasn’t up threw you over. You threw down the tent pegs you’s been about to put in for the 7th time and stormed off.

 

“Where are you going?” He managed to sound slightly exasperated that you were leaving him with the tent.

 

“I hate you.” you seethed.

 

“Why? I’m a delight.” He grinned.

 

You screamed and walked away. If you didn’t leave right now you knew you’d throw a hammer at him or something and the last thing you needed was for a lawsuit from YG for damaging his face.

 

You stomped through the woods, crushing flowers and snapping twigs all while imagining they were him. Back in Seoul you got along just fine with him. He liked art and wine and good food and long chats and travel. The few times you’d chatted with him in the past you’d had an extremely fun time but something about him and this camping trip just wasn’t working. You’d come out here hoping to get closer to your crush, impressing him with your mad camping skills and even tempered nature. You scoffed. So far that was a complete failure.

 

TOP just had a way of getting under your skin out here. His sarcasm and wit were the opposite of what you were after and you were completely embarrassed that he’d left you by yourself to fail in front of the rest of the group for hours. They’d all laughed at you attempting to light the fire and put your tent together. It must have been so entertaining for them. You knew it was because over the course of that hour they’d come over a few times and draped a blanket over you telling you you’d need all the extra warmth you could get since you’d be sleeping without a fire or a tent. They meant it as a light hearted joke but your mood was too foul to see the humour in it.

 

You calmed down as much as you could, having successfully reprimanded him in your mind, before returning to camp. You hadn’t expected to return to find the tent gone and your fire extinguished but it’s what you arrived back to. “The fuck-”

 

“YAH. Over here!” You looked over in the direction TOP’s voice had come from and spotted him beckoning you to come over to him.

 

You went to him purely because you wanted a particularly excellent reason for why he not only extinguished the fire that had taken you over an hour to light but also why he’d taken the tent. As you got closer to him he reached out and grabbed your hand, pulling you through the trees until you reached a clearing. In the middle of the clearing was your tent, perfectly set up complete with a fire and from the smell wafting over to you, dinner was cooking too.

 

You stared up at him, eyes wide and mouth agape, the words lost on your tongue. He chuckled. “I know, you’re impressed.”

 

“Why did you move our camp?” you asked tentatively.

 

“If you’d stayed before rather than stomping off to snuff out the plant life while you imagined it was my face you would have found out then. When we arrived I thought the site was too cramped. I don’t know much about camping but it all looked like a fire hazard to me. So I wandered off to find the ranger who showed me the best spot to make camp. He was a fan so I ended up staying and chatting a bit longer then he offered to take me down to the local store to stock up on supplies so I complied. I hung the bags from one of the trees here and came back to camp to tell you but you blew up at me and stormed off. I tried to tell the others but they all figured they’d already set up so they weren’t moving. I dragged all our stuff out here and set up while you vicariously murdered me through plants.”

 

You faltered. This whole time you thought he’d been slacking off when really he’d been trying to find a better spot to make camp. He’d even done all of the hard work in setting this site up and started cooking, which smelled amazing. You couldn’t look at him. You felt ashamed that you’d been so mad at him when he’d done nothing wrong.

 

He cleared his throat and gestured for you to sit near the fire. “Uh food will be ready soon. I have no idea if it will be any good or if it will poison us, fair warning.” You took a seat, still in shock that he wasn’t so useless at camping as he’d led everyone to believe.

 

A soft warmth was suddenly draped around you and you looked up at him, a puzzled expression on your face. “Why do people keep trying to put a blanket on me?”

 

“Do you have a problem with blankets?” He chuckled.

 

“Shut up, I still hate you.” You giggled.

 

“And I’m still a delight. Wine?”

 

“Fuck yes.”

 


	3. Farewell Couch

Prompt: Chanyeol + “I have never been this comfortable in my life.” + “I’ve been looking for you.”

Setting/AU: Roommate AU

Warnings: None - this is just crack

Word Count: 1270

 

 

“Yah! Roomie! I’ve been looking for you.” Chanyeol’s loud voice boomed across the courtyard. “Where have you been all day?”

 

You stopped walking and turned, waiting for him to catch up and be within range of normal speaking volume. Your roommate never has any problems embarrassing you in public, and holding a conversation from 20m away is up there with things that make you want to crawl into a hole and hide. “Chan, I’ve been at work all day.” He knew this, he was usually really good at remembering your schedule. A niggling feeling started to form, he only ever forgot schedules when something bad had happened or he’d done something stupid. “Chan, why have you been looking for me?” You asked, half not wanting to know the answer.

 

He took a deep breath and started. “Well you know how our couch is legit falling to pieces?”

 

You nodded. “Yeah. It was falling apart when you got it off Sehun.”

 

“It was a good deal! He was giving it away for free since he was moving in with that rich kid Suho.” You chuckled and shook your head. That fucking couch would haunt you forever. The first night it was in your house a rat ran out of it and Chanyeol refused to let you set traps to catch it. Instead he’d sat up all night and surrounded himself with morsels of food so that he could lure the rat to him and earn it’s trust. You ended up calling his sister when you realised that if his plan worked he’d try to keep it. She’d turned up and made him promise to set it free but gave him a deadline. If it wasn’t in his arms by the following day you were allowed to call an exterminator. He’d looked so crestfallen at the idea of the rat getting fumigated and he worked even harder to get it to trust him.

 

Chanyeol being Chanyeol, all animals loved him so naturally by the time you woke up he was cradling a rat in his arms. “If you’ve given it a name I’m kicking you out.” He’d kept his promise, but he made you drive him and the rat, who you were sure he’d named but he refused to admit it, out to the edge of the forest so that he could set it free. You didn’t have the heart to tell him it’d probably be dead by nightfall.

 

That couch marked several pivotal moments in your friendship. Your first movie marathon (where Chan forced you to watch like eight Disney movies and got super emotional in all of them - you never wanted to discuss Bambi or Fox & The Hound with him ever again), first fight (you’d threatened to throw out his music equipment if he didn’t replace his headphones so he’d barricaded his door with the couch so that you couldn’t get in… it actually soundproofed the room so you didn’t mind how stupid it looked), first drunken night of bonding (you both cried over just how good dogs were and how we as a race didn’t deserve them). There were countless more memories but that couch had been on its last legs for about 3 years now.

 

“What about the couch Chan?”

 

He took a deep breath. “It broke.”

 

“It’s broken before.”

 

“Ok fine, it didn’t survive surgery this time. Time of death was 1pm.”

 

“Wait so it’s finally beyond repair?”

 

He nodded solemnly. “I’m afraid so.” He paused, as though thinking over his next words. You cut him off before he could say it though. Years of sharing a house with him had prepared you for what he was about to ask.

 

“We’re not having a funeral for the couch Chan.”

 

“But -”

 

“No.” You had to be firm about this or he’d find the one crack in your resolve and the next thing you knew you’d be giving a eulogy for a fucking couch.

 

“Fine. I’ll have Kai come and help me move it to the junkyard.” He turned to head off in the direction of your house. “Can you meet me at Old John’s at 6?”

 

“Yeah, why?”

 

He grinned. “Coz my dear roommate, we are getting a new couch!”

 

“Geez the old one isn’t even dead 3 hours before you’ve moved on.”

 

“I’m trying not to focus on Betty right now.” He replied.

 

“Betty?” You asked.

 

He feigned disgust. “The couch. Betty is the couch, you uncultured swine!”

 

“Fucking hell. Remind me why we’re roommates again?” You groaned.

 

“Because I enrich your life. Gotta go! Be there at 6!” With that he ran off into the distance, leaving you shaking your head because, of course he named the goddamn couch.

 

***

 

You were pretty sure you’d tried every couch in a 5 mile radius and like 70% of them were fine but Chanyeol was scrutinizing every single one. You didn’t get it. The last couch was lumpy and falling to pieces and he had no problems loving it but picking a new one seemed to be the most difficult thing in the universe.

 

“Chan come on! Most of these couches are great, what is your problem?” You whined.

 

“They lack personality.” He stated.

 

“It’ll develop personality once it lives with us, if it knows what’s good for it.” You muttered loud enough for Chanyeol to hear you. He chuckled at your remark.

 

“Ok fine. I’m gonna go sit in one of those beanbags while I make a decision ok?” He pointed over to the far corner of the store where beanbags of all sizes were sitting. “My butt hurts from sitting in all of these couches.” He complained.

 

“You don’t have a butt Chan.” You deadpanned.

 

“Rude.” He pointed at you disapprovingly.

 

“I speak truth roomie.” You narrowly avoided a flick from Chanyeol. “Just make your decision in the next 10 minutes. I want to go home already.” You ached from standing all day at the cafe and you really just wanted to get a couch and either go home and lie on it or lie in your bed, you really didn’t care but it had to be soon otherwise you’d start getting crabby with everyone.

 

Chanyeol walked off and launched himself into the biggest fabric bean bag he could find. It wasn’t really a bean bag though, it was more of a giant cloud encased in fabric. “Holy fuck, come here NOW.”

 

You ran over thinking he’d somehow injured himself or broken the beanbag. If you had to pick you’d choose the former since you really couldn’t afford it and a new couch at the same time.

 

When you reached Chanyeol he looked like he’d reached nirvana. His eyes found yours and he smiled. “Oh my god. Seriously you need to try this.” He didn’t give you a chance to respond before pulling you down to lie next to him in the giant not-beanbag.

 

You understood the look on his face now. It was what you imagined lying in a cloud would feel like. “I have never been this comfortable in my life.”

 

“We’re not buying it.”

 

“The tag says its a love sac” He tried to get the words out but he was laughing too hard so it took him three attempts before he managed to it out.

 

“Then we’re really not buying one.” You choked out.

 

“That would be cruel, we would have to buy a pair.” He broke down into a laughing fit and you couldn’t help but follow suit.

 

Ten minutes later you’d managed to come back to your senses long enough to poke him and get out. “Pick a fucking couch already.”


	4. Aurora Borealis

Prompt: Xiumin + “You heard me. Take it off.” + “I promise I won’t bite. Unless you ask.”

Setting/AU: Tattoo AU

Warnings: Tattoos, mentioning of needles, a terrible description of a tattoo coz I suck at making it sound nice. Nothing else.

Word Count: 1775

 

“What if they fuck it up and you’re stuck with a mangled tattoo on your body for life?”

 

“Really not helping with my anxiety Youngshin.” You glared up at your so called best friend, whose status as best friend was currently being re-evaluated in your mind. She knew you had wanted a tattoo for forever and she also knew you hated needles so she made sure to be equal parts supportive and trying to scare you out of doing it. She always came through in the end but she sure as hell would take a roundabout way of getting there which more often than not tested your limits with her.

 

“Sorry. Listen you get to sit down and chat with the artist, they’ll talk to you about placement and if they think it’s too much for you to handle as a first tattoo or not. You can go to that first consultation and your gut will let you know if you need to go through with it or run for the hills.” She smiled and poked her tongue out at you. “See, I can be a good friend when I need to be.”

 

***

 

You clutched the plastic sleeve containing your designs like they were your lifeline as you walked towards the shop. The fluorescent Planet Ink sign flickered in the shop front as you stepped through the door. You took a deep breath to try and calm your nerves before approaching the counter.

 

One of the artists stepped out from a room, talking with a client as he lead her towards the door. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair, the gesture making you think he was frustrated with how that consultation had gone but was trying to remain professional about it. “Trust me, you don’t want a gaudy snowflake or the Icecapades above your ass for the rest of time.”

 

You choked back a laugh and coughed lightly. The girl didn’t notice but he sure did, his intense gaze flicking over to you for a moment before he was back to focusing on the client in front of him. You felt for him, this girl had clearly come in with some grand ideas about a lower back tattoo but there appeared to be an issue of taste. He was clearly repeating himself and you weren’t sure how many more times you could hear “Yes, but like I mentioned before…” before you snapped and pushed the girl out of the shop.

 

She finally relented to go home and rethink the design and placement. He’d suggested forearm and that he could still do a beautiful piece there fitting with the ice theme she was after. She left and as he closed the door he held his palms against it and spoke to you without looking at you. “Please don’t tell me you are here for the Northern Lights above your ass or a garden or cat above your pussy or some shit like that.”    

 

You laughed at the exasperated tone in his voice. “Aurora Borealis? At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely above my ass?”

 

His laughter filled the shop and it was contagious. You couldn’t stop once you started and you could see him wiping his eyes, he’d laughed that hard. Once he’d composed himself he came over to the counter to speak to you. “Ok, you can stay. Fuck. I needed that. Please tell me you were my next appointment.”

 

“Are you Xiumin?”

 

He beamed. “That’s me. Ok follow me and we can chat.”

 

He took off towards one of the rooms with you following closely behind. When you entered he gestured for you to take a seat on the chair. You complied and took a moment to look around the room. The walls were adorned with designs and photos of finished tattoos. The range of styles was incredible and you found yourself in awe. Lost in your own little world you didn’t realise Xiumin had been talking to you until his form blocked your view and he cleared his throat. He stared down at you, that intense gaze taking on a playful nature.

 

“First time huh?”

 

You nodded. “Is it that obvious?”

 

“It’s written all over your face. The fear, apprehension, excitement and the fact that you ignored me to look at my work. I guess I should be flattered.”

 

“So… how does this work?” You asked.

 

“We chat, and from that I get a feel for what you can handle and hopefully some inspiration for placement and design.” He glanced at the plastic sleeve in your hands. “Or, tweak a design so that it’ll work as a tattoo. So, tell me what you’re after.”

 

You handed him the sleeve and let him gaze over the various designs you’d sketched. “I’m no tattoo artist so I didn’t want to come in with a fully fledged design. I don’t know what works on skin but these elements are things I want worked into the design. I researched for a few months and everyone I spoke to recommended you are the best person for the job. I want to blend colour splashes with the representations of the physical elements in the background of the wolf. I want it to look like one flowing image rather than a wolf with things stuck around it. I have no preference for where it goes, scratch that, no tramp stamp.”

 

Xiumin stared at the drawings for a few minutes while chewing on his bottom lip. You could almost see the cogs turning in his mind as he processed everything. “Do the wolf or elements have special meaning to you or is it just an image that you like?”

 

“It holds meaning. The wolf represents determination, bravery and intellect and the elements represent the various hurdles you reach in life and how you overcome them. I’m happy for it to just look like a nice piece of art - as long as these things are worked into it, I’ll know the meaning.”

 

“Meaning helps for placement as well. I think it’s something you’ll want to be able to look at without much difficulty so that eliminates your shoulders and back. I’m just gonna go sketch something up so I can see what you think and how it’ll look where I want to place it. Wait in here for me.”

 

Xiumin smiled warmly then got up and left the room, leaving you to sit and stare at all of the artwork. There were some incredibly cool designs here. You knew he was talented but seeing that amassed on a wall really solidified it for you.You felt like you’d made the right choice with the artist, now you just had to see what he came up with and then if you could even go through with it. The fear of the pain was very real but you were trying to keep it at bay.

 

Xiumin returned with a piece of wax paper and a sketchpad. He pulled his stool over toward you and took a seat. He handed you the sketchpad and uncovered the drawing he’d done. He let you stare at it for a minute before speaking. “Ok so I started with the wolf. I only wanted to put the face and a little bit of the body in, and I made part of the outline for the wolf the constellation that you wanted in there to represent the galaxy. Then I made the background overlay of the other elements, I did two versions. One is just the colours like ink blots that all fade in and link up and the other is pretty much the same but the ink blots have a partial outline of the elements. Here for example.” He pointed at the dark blue colour burst. “There is half of the water droplet outline on the edge. I wanted to keep that subtle so it didn’t overcrowd the image.” 

 

He took a deep breath. “What do you think?”

 

You shuddered out a breath. The image was perfect. It was exactly what you wanted but so much better than you could have imagined it. To anyone except you it was just a wolf tattoo with water colour bursts in the background but to you it held so much more meaning. You gazed up at Xiumin and smiled. “It’s amazing. I don’t have the right words for it but it’s exactly what I want.”

 

He grinned and grabbed the wax paper which you could see had a rough outline on it. “I mean if you hated it we can always go back to the excellent image of the northern lights as a tramp stamp.”

 

You laughed loudly. “God no. This, please do this.”

 

He chuckled and sat back in his chair. “Good choice. Now for placement I was thinking forearm. If you take off your overshirt I can show you how it’d look.”

 

You moved to push your sleeve up when he tutted at you. “You heard me. Take it off. The placement looks more natural if you don’t have fabric bundled all around it. Especially since it’s your first time.”

 

You reached down and removed your overshirt, leaving you in a tank top. You shivered at the sudden rush of cool air hitting your arms, curling into yourself without thinking. You didn’t know why but suddenly you were feeling rather exposed in front of Xiumin when all you’d done was remove an overshirt. It had to be his gaze. You could feel his eyes on you, taking in all of he bare skin he could see, not in a lewd way but in more of an artist staring at a blank canvas kind of way. It was unrelenting. It didn’t help that he was stunning, all blonde hair and gorgeous features mixed with leather and some incredible black and white work on his arms. You could see the edges of a filigree design creeping from his shirt up to the base of his throat and you gulped. Another chuckle brought you back out of your daze and you blushed. You hadn’t realised you’d been staring.

 

“I promise I won’t bite.” You held your arm out to him and he wrapped the wax paper around it, showing you how the design would look when it was on your arm. You were lost in the moment, realising that you were actually going to go through with this. You were getting this tattoo, hatred of needles be damned. 

 

You might have been in a daze but you were sure you heard him murmur “Unless you ask.” under his breath.


	5. Prison Break

Prompt: Suho + “You’re an idiot. I’m an idiot. We’re the co-presidents of club idiot.” + “I think you got the wrong number but count me in anyway. It sounds like fun!”

Setting/AU: Urban Fantasy AU

Warnings: Supernatural beings - only a mention, magical beings, nothing else.

Word Count: 1137

 

“Can you please remind me how we ended up in this mess?” You asked.

 

“Technically. This is your fault.” Came his response. “I was minding my own business when you sent that text to the wrong number.”

 

You scoffed. “You could have ignored me or left it at ‘I think you have the wrong number’ but no. You had to add on ‘but count me in anyway. It sounds like fun!’ so don’t you dare try to put all of this on me.”

 

The room was dark, grimy and freezing. There was no part of it that could hide you from the chill breeze that seemed to be unrelenting even though you were in a room with no windows. The stone walls and floor did nothing to provide comfort or warmth and as the hours dragged by the two of you became more and more irritable.

 

It wasn’t your fault that this idiot had responded to your text and enthusiastically offered to join you. The original idea was simple - sneak into the castle and leave a seeing stone somewhere where it would provide intel for later missions but somewhere along the lines it morphed into capture one of the vampire spawn and bring them back to interrogate.

 

Suho had been so excited to join you and asked so many questions about the history of vampires and how you’d fallen in with a local vampire hunter and well, you’d gotten worked up and a bit cocky.

 

The fact that you were both now in a cell in the dungeon of said castle spoke volumes to how well the mission had gone. “You’re an idiot. I’m an idiot. We’re the co-presidents of club idiot.” You snapped.

 

“In what way am I -”

 

You cut him off. “Offering to help break into Count Von Strahd’s castle with a stranger on a whim. That’s how.”

 

“And you?” He retorted.

 

“By letting you come along and by deciding I could capture a spawn on my own. I’m the thief not the brute. I break in undetected and steal or plant objects. That’s my expertise.” You sighed. You’d never live this down when your party worked out that you were stuck here.

 

He busied himself with tracing lines along the stone. It bothered you that he wasn’t more afraid right now. Any normal person would be shaking in their boots if they’d been captured by Strahd but then again normal people didn’t ask to join in on a break in either.

 

The more you thought about it the more you decided that you weren’t really sure who this guy was. All you knew was that he told you his name was Suho and that Strahd had abducted his sister a couple of months ago so he was keen to take him down in any way possible.

 

You stared at him, committing all of his features to memory, the dark hair, the dewy complexion, the slight but strong figure. Suho was a mystery and you did not like mysteries. You couldn’t just crack a mystery with a lockpick. This sort of crap was far more suited to a druid, you lacked the patience.

 

“Don’t you have lockpicks? Why haven’t you tried those?” He asked without turning to look at you, still tracing the stones with his fingers.

 

“They patted me down when we got captured and they were unduly thorough. All I have left is one dagger, a small candle, four pitons and a waterskin that’s basically empty.” You replied.

 

He turned his head suddenly and held out his hand. “Give me the waterskin.”

 

You frowned. “Why? Suho there is like half a mouthful of water left in it.”

 

“That’s all I’ll need.” You had no idea what he meant by that but you handed it over anyway. He gripped it and moved along the wall with purpose, dragging his fingers across as much stone as he could.

 

“Ok, what the fuck are you doing?” You snapped.

 

“Bring the dagger over here.” He beckoned.

 

“Why?”

 

“Just hurry.”

 

“No. Fuck you, tell me why.” You’d never done well with orders or people ignoring your questions.

 

“If you want to get out of here alive you’ll do as I say thief.” He snapped.

 

That grabbed your attention. You got up silently and padded over to where Suho was crouched down. He pointed at a join in the stones and asked you to poke your dagger through as far as you could. You glared at him but did as he asked. Once you’d done that he uncapped the waterskin and let a few droplets land on the edge of the dagger. With his other hand he slammed his palm against the stone and you felt a strange whoosh pass over you. Your eyes bugged and you shifted back a few paces.

 

“What are you doing and why the FUCK did you not tell me you could cast spells?”

 

“It’s not a spell. I have elemental magic with an affinity to water. I can form a tunnel down to us from the river that flows next to this castle but I needed some water to be able to call it to us. Like to like.”

 

He fell silent for several minutes and you found yourself listening as hard as you could for any sign that what he was doing was working.

 

When he scrambled back from the wall you moved to his side as fast as you could. After that everything happened so quickly. The stone made a noise that you were certain it should not make before 5 of the stones dislodged from the wall and were shot forward by a small torrent of water. The two of you had to wait for the water to rush out into the small cell you were in before you could rush in to the hole and start your ascent back up to the surface. It was dark and damp and claustrophobic but you’d never been happier to see your pitons and you were not stopping until you climbed out at the river’s edge.

 

When the two of you finally made it, covered in mud and grit, to the surface you didn’t pause to rest. The two of you had to get as far from the castle as fast as possible so you ran and ran and ran until the edge of town came into view.

 

It was as you finally paused to catch your breath that you heard an equally puffed Suho say “We might be co-presidents of club idiot but we are resourceful idiots.”

 

You couldn’t help but smile at that.


	6. So Handsome

Prompt: Luhan + “If you’re bored I can think of other ways to pass the time…” + “I see the way you look at me when you think I’m not looking.”

Setting/AU: Library/College AU

Warnings: None really, cocky Luhan, implied smut.

Word Count: 1241

Seriously how did you end up in this situation? Libraries were supposed to be for studying, or reading or researching. They were not supposed to be like this. You were not supposed to be this excited when surrounded by aisles and aisles of books. You remembered going to the library when you were at school. It was the place where you had to whisper and be quiet. It was where you chose to go during lunch breaks so that you could read. It was the place where the other kids flocked to on rainy days for shelter or hot days to take advantage of the air conditioning.

 

During university the balance shifted. Your love of the library dwindled when you spent so many hours there studying and researching. College dorms were not the ideal place for peace and quiet so the library was like your second home. You even had the best spot picked out, it was up the far back left corner of the fourth floor. The elevator was always broken so the odds of anyone dragging themselves up all 4 sets of stairs just to be loud and annoying was rare. The only books up here were on social theory and crime and you knew damn well that 80% of them were also on the first floor in the criminal law or sociology section. 

 

There was one problem though. One very distracting problem and his name was Luhan. You knew who he was, it was difficult to live at a college dorm and not hear about Luhan. Girls flocked to him and guys wanted to be him. The guy was attractive, unfairly so, a top notch soccer player, a killer dancer and a seemingly overconfident ladies man. Tales of his conquests were a weekly occurance in your dorm. Until two weeks ago you’d never met the guy but you kind of hated him. Well, you hadn’t officially met him until two weeks ago, but you had acknowledged his existence at the odd mixer or frat party when your friends dragged you along to them. Two weeks ago everything changed. Two weeks ago he expanded your knowledge of exactly what one could do in the secluded aisles of the fourth floor. As it turned out, the answer was a lot.

 

Two weeks ago you’d been following your normal routine - finish classes, grab a snack and head to the library, climb the stairs and study in peace in your favourite spot - when he showed up. At first you were shocked that someone other than library staff and you even knew there was a fourth floor. Then you were annoyed at the idea of your space being violated, a feeling that you quickly squashed because it wasn’t really your space, it was public space and how were you to know if it wasn’t a like minded individual who wanted to escape the lower levels where study was surrounded by distractions.

 

You looked up from your books and watched the figure that was coming up the stairs. Disheveled brown hair was the first thing you spotted, followed by a face that did not belong on a human male. It was so youthful and angelic with doe eyes and inviting lips. He looked up when he reached the top of the stairs and your eyes met. You inclined your head as a way of greeting and he did the same before disappearing into the aisles.

 

You shook your head and tried to focus back on your paper but it was no use. You found yourself glancing around the aisles from your seat trying to spot him. He’d appear with a book in hand at the end of one aisle before disappearing again. _Get a grip. You have a very important paper to write. Stop gawking at the stupidly attractive guy._ You mentally scolded yourself and forced yourself back to writing.

 

In your periphery you spotted the white and black of his varsity jacket as he sat at the end of the table, placing a few books in front of him. You glanced at him as he slumped into the seat, his pen dangling from his mouth. _STUDY_.

 

You stared at your paper. You’d been right in the middle of fleshing out your argument for the decriminalisation of prostitution when the ultimate distraction had ascended the stairs. The essay had to be five thousand words and you planned to use each and every one of them. Most of the students would go the easy route, opting to simply support keeping it illegal. You found it much more interesting to counter that argument by not only debunking the popular myths and taboos about sex work but by also offering a vision of how sex work might look if it was a legitimised, legal job. You’d bring up point for standard health and hygiene requirements for both workers and customers, applying taxes, job security, safer work environments and more. You refused to let him throw off your train of thought and by proxy, lower your grade.

 

In your mind the two of you started a game of cat and mouse over the course of the next week. You’d come up to study and write your paper and then he’d appear and do his best at distracting your thoughts by simply sitting at the table. You wondered if he knew how much strife he was causing you by simply existing.

 

***

 

“If you’re bored I can think of other ways to pass the time…”

 

You jumped, startled by how close his voice was to you. The last time you’d checked he was all the way down the other end of the table. Now he was sitting right next to you, leaning towards you, a certain look in his eyes.

 

“Wh-what makes you think I’m bored?” You grabbed your bottle and took a sip of your water to try and make your throat feel a little less dry.

 

A devilish little smirk formed on his face. “You’ve been staring into space for like the past twenty minutes. Usually you are either staring at your books or at me.” You choked on your water, almost spitting it across the table. “I see the way you look at me when you think I’m not looking.”

 

“I’m not - I don’t - Why would -” Words were failing you and that only seemed to amuse him more.

 

“Cat got your tongue?”

 

“I just - How dare -”

 

He laughed. “Relax. I don’t mind.” He gestured at his face and winked at you. “I’m just that handsome.”

 

“And a little full of yourself.” You poked his shoulder as he feigned offense at your words.

 

“Seriously though, what’s got you staring into space? You’re usually more focused than that.” He leant on the desk, resting his head in his hands as he watched you.

 

“I’m stuck on one point on my essay. I know what I want to say but I can’t get the right words out.” He grinned and grabbed your hand, tugging it as he stood up, indicating for you to do the same.  He dragged you into one of the aisles and caged you between his arms. “What are you doing?”

 

“You need to empty your mind and lucky for you, I have multiple ways to help you do just that.” He pressed his body to yours and nipped at the exposed flesh of your neck, causing you to gasp.

 

“This is a _library!_ ”

 

He raised his eyebrow at you and scrunched his face. “I’m well aware of that, I just currently don’t care. Now, can we try my method for clearing your mind. I’d really prefer it if you said yes.”


	7. Sugar Induced Dreams

Prompt: Suho + “You taste like fucking candy.” + “Where are your pants?”

Setting/AU: Plane/Airport/Mile High Club

Warnings: Some smut.

Word Count: 1158

 

“Do you have to carry around a bag of candy while we’re in the airport babe?”

 

You stared at your husband and raised an eyebrow at him. “What’s your problem with candy? It’s a happy food.”

 

He sighed deeply. You knew he hated candy. The guy was a health nut so you never got to eat it in the house and you just couldn’t say no when you left the hotel this morning and saw a little girl trying to raise money to buy a puppy. So you bought a bag of candy off her and you were currently wolfing it down as the two of you made your way through the airport. Suho had indulged you for about 5 minutes before realising that you weren’t just going to throw it out. Then the sighs and looks started which only made you eat more of the candy.

 

He was giving you that look right now. That look that said _you are a grown adult and you know you’re only eating all of this candy to spite me, grow up_. You probably were being childish but you also refused to be reprimanded in public by your husband on your way to your honeymoon.

 

“It’s unhealthy, you’ll be on a sugar high for the first hour of the flight and then you’ll crash and be moody and horrible to be around for the following eight hours. Also eating it out of that bag makes you look like a child. It seriously looks like a kids birthday party lolly bag.”

 

You choked back a laugh. “Babe, chill out. I’m clearly not a child, let me enjoy my treat.” You grinned at him and put another handful of candy in your mouth. He shook his head at you and you continued your journey to gate 48.

 

When you both arrived at the gate Suho asked you to wait while he went to check something at the desk. You nodded and took a seat, happily watching his peachy ass walk away from you. The two of you had been exhausted after the wedding and reception yesterday but as soon as you reached your hotel room neither of you were very tired. _Maybe I’m eating so much sugar because someone exhausted me thoroughly last night_. You smiled to yourself as you remembered the mindblowingly good sex you’d had.

 

***

 

“I can’t believe you got us upgraded to first class! You really are the best husband a girl could ever ask for.” You beamed up at him. He’d come back from the desk with a shit eating grin on his face and he’d refused to tell you why he was so happy. You say refused but he’d offered to tell you if you threw away your candy but like, fuck that. So he’d sat next to you at the gate, massive grin plastered on his face, laughing intermittently to himself and not telling you a thing for half an hour before he told you. You cupped his face in your hands and pulled him down into a kiss, his soft lips pressing against yours.

 

He broke the kiss and glared at you before muttering “You taste like fucking candy.”

 

You ignored him because you were too happy to care. Or possibly too high on sugar, who could know? All you knew is that yesterday you’d married the love of your life, celebrated with all of your friends and family, had phenomenal sex and then today you’d gotten a bag of candy, were flying first class and spending two weeks in Fiji with your husband. You were on cloud 9 and not even him fretting about the unhealthy food you were consuming (he refused to even call it food) could bring you down.

 

He was right though, you’d had a massive sugar crash about an hour into the flight and passed out. He was always right about shit like that and no matter how much it irritated you when he started with the ‘I told you so’ speeches you knew deep down it was his way of caring and looking out for you. He wasn’t stupid enough to bring it up while trapped on a plane with you after a sugar crash though. Instead he shifted around in the little cabin you had, allowing you to rest your head on his chest and draping a blanket over the both of you. “Sleep it off yeobo.”

 

Your dreams were all over the place and you were pretty sure if he could, Suho would gladly inform you that all of the sugar was making your dreams so crazy. You dreamt in technicolour, one moment you were running through an endless maze and the next you were chasing a bunny down a hole that led you to a strange lab where men in white were running all over the place. You blinked and you were in an underground casino sipping wine and gambling when a pink haired man, not unsimilar to Suho barged through the doors brandishing a bat. You blinked again and you were swimming with mermaids in the ocean, then joining a strange fight in space. There was no rhyme or reason to the dreams - just your subconscious running wild. Throughout all of these dreams you got flashes in black and white  of skin against skin, hands gripping silk sheets, legs wrapped around hips, moans and whispers of untold lust.

 

You woke up flustered and confused…and a ~~little~~ lot horny. You shifted in the blanket and became very aware of two things. 1. You were not the only horny one and 2. Your new husband, your upstanding, perfect, model citizen of a husband, wasn’t wearing any pants. In public.

 

You smirked to yourself and reached down to grasp his length in your hand and slowly started moving your hand up and down. He sucked in a breath, not realising you were awake. You knew if you looked at him now, red would dust his cheeks from embarrassment but his eyes would be clouding over with lust. You were too turned on from the flashed you saw in your dreams and the last thing you wanted was for him to have a moment of clarity and decide that you needed to stop.

 

“Where are your pants?”

 

“I can explai-fuck” the sensation of your mouth around his cock stopped his train of thought. You bobbed up and down a few times before removing him from your mouth with a pop.

 

Now you turned to glance at him and he was grinning at you. Not what you were expecting.

 

“What?”

 

“Generally you lick a lollipop before you suck on it.” He kept grinning but it faltered when you lowered your head back to his cock and gave the tip a few kitten licks before licking him from base to tip.

 

“Hmm, in my dream it was tutti frutti.” You muttered to yourself.

 

“What?”

 

“Nothing. Now be quiet and enjoy yourself.”


	8. Not the Best Plan

Prompt: Xiumin + “This plan of yours is going to get us killed. Of course I’m in.” + “Shut up and kiss me already.”

Setting/AU: Mafia

Warnings: Swearing, use of alcohol, heavy petting but no real smut…yet.

Word Count: 1253

 

 

“Why the red dress?” you asked.

 

He cocked his eyebrow at you. “Well it’s red, and a dress. Historically red dresses have a way of distracting the eyes of men who should otherwise be paying close attention to me. That’s why the red dress.”

 

You rolled your eyes. “Fine. Then I’ll ask, why me? Why not use Sumi or Nana or any one of the other women here? They always get dress duty, that’s not my thing and you know it.” 

 

Xiumin chuckled and approached the table you were at. He picked up one of your knives and twirled it expertly between his fingers before placing it down on the table again. “This job requires your other abilities too. The red dress is just the uniform to get you in the building. Suho’s intel suggests that the room we need access to is at the back of the estate, guarded by trigger happy lackeys and a state of the art lock and surveillance system. The job requires both of us and the only way in that won’t raise suspicion is to attend the party. But not the obvious party. No we are to attend the illegal auction hidden elsewhere in the estate but we have to take on the roles that Chen gave us. We have to be those people or the plan goes to shit.”

 

You sigh and thumb the hilt of your rapier. “It’s a pity we can’t just waltz in and maim the fuckers until they give us what we want.” You tap the ilt a few more times before lifting your gaze to Xiumin’s eyes. “Alright, show me the godforsaken dress. I’ll need to work out what weapons I can get in with that won’t scream _‘Hi, I’m here to rob you and if you try anything I’ll gut you where you stand.’ ”_

 

He jumped a little, shocked that you’d agreed so quickly. He needed to hear it out loud though. He needed you to say you were in before he let you put your life in his hands. “So you’re in?”

 

You levelled your gaze. “This plan of yours is going to get us killed. Of course I’m in.” You shook your head. “Well…it’ll either get us killed or make us rich. I’ve always been a sucker for shitty odds like that.”

 

Xiumin let out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding in and he laughed. He would never admit it but the plan really did hinge on your participation. All other methods of getting their missing member back were far less subtle and far more dangerous. No one stole from Cloud 9 and got away with it. Especially not when what they stole was a member.

 

***

 

You hated this dress. It showed off too much and didn’t allow you to conceal weapons effectively. All you’d been able to get in with were lockpicks disguised as hair pins, a daggers strapped to your inner thigh and a poison tipped hidden blade in one of your rings. You hated feeling this bare and hated the face that you had to rely of Xiumin to keep the two of you alive.

 

The schmoozing and small talk was usually done by Baekhyun. That guy could work a room like no other and you were a little skeptical of how quiet but deadly Xiumin would go. Like you, he was usually kept in the shadows, striking when people least expected it. His face never gave away whatever atrocity he’d just committed while you were blinking. He was excellent at his job. A quiet assassin, someone who could smooth talk any man or woman - as long as they were alone. Groups were where he faltered. Groups like the one you were in now.

 

He’d gotten past the front gate and the main party without any hiccups but the secret auction, where you were now, was a different story. Everyone here was a criminal and as a general rule, they were harder to fool. This would be what tested him. You played your part, the accessory, the woman who was with the handsome man, the woman who didn’t care how he got his money as long as he could afford to keep you happy. The red dress did it’s part as well, eyes fell on you as he planted bugs on the targets.

 

As soon as he’d finished planting the bugs you had to create a reason for the two of you to step out early. Kai turned up in the role of Xiumin’s business associate for the night. Once the two of them got to talking and faking interest in various items on the auction list you got to work. You made sure you were seen every time you grabbed a champagne flute so that it was realistic when your movements became a little less graceful and you got a little bit handsy with Xiumin.

 

You hadn’t told him this part of them plan, you’d told him it would be more realistic if he didn’t know what you were going to do. He’d genuinely looked annoyed when you grabbed his tie and pulled him closer to you. “What are you playing at?” He murmured into your ear.

 

“Shut up and kiss me already.” you whispered back, all slurring gone from your voice. You felt him tense for a fleeting moment before capturing your lips with his. You pulled him against you as you stumbled backwards, his strong arms holding you steady. Your mouths worked against each other as you deepened the kiss. Xiumin broke away first, stepping back slightly and reminding you why you were here.

 

“Come on babe, ease off on the booze and we can have our fun after I finish the auction.” He tried to reason with you but you weren’t having it.

 

You slid your finger down his chest until his hand stopped you, dangerously close to his belt. “But I want you now. I don’t wanna wait.” Out of the corner of your eye you saw one of the guards stop within earshot. You leant in towards Xiumin and whispered loud enough for the guard to hear. “I’m not wearing any panties.” The guard coughed as you smirked up at Xiumin who was staring back at you with an intense gaze.

 

“Kai, please take care of the bids as we discussed. I have to go deal with something.” Kai nodded as Xiumin unceremoniously dragged you towards the door. The guard gave him a knowing grin and pointed him towards the back of the estate.

 

“Sir, that way is uh, more secluded.” Xiumin thanked him and the two of you headed off in that direction, pausing so he could push you up against a wall and devour your mouth again.

 

When you heard the door close the two of you halted your movements and quietly headed off towards the building at the rear of the estate. Xiumin stopped in a copse of trees and turned to you. “Ready to get Baekhyun back?” You nodded. “Ok, well. Sorry in advance for how far we might have to take this in order to get the guards to give us some privacy.”

 

You stopped him before he could say anything more. You knew the risks and you accepted them. You hoped it wouldn’t come to fucking Xiumin in public but if that is what it took to make some guards fuck off so you could pick a lock then so be it. You stared up at him. “Let’s do this.”


	9. Royal Pain

Prompt: Taehyung + “I hate you.” “Why? I’m a delight.”

Setting/AU: Royal AU

Warnings: none, moody Tae.

Word Count: 1279

A/N: I haven’t written Tae before so hopefully I didn’t fuck that up. 

 

“Remind me again why father keeps you around?” Prince Taehyung’s voice carried from the bathing chamber out to his main quarters where you were laying out the last of the required garments for the day.

 

You walked over to the entrance to the chamber, not entering unless you were summoned. “I’m a loyal servant, I’m efficient, polite and know the inner workings of the court. And I’m the only person you haven’t managed to scare off that he trusts.” You stood in the doorway, arm crossed as you stared at the young Prince.

 

“Then remind me why I have to get dressed today.” He sunk further into the tub, soaking his aching limbs. When he was submerged up to his neck he opened one eye and glanced over at you as he waited for you to answer.

 

“Today is the royal wedding of your brother Prince Jimin. You are required to attend in full regalia. I have laid the clothes out on the bed for when you finish bathing. If there is nothing else my lord, may I be excused?”

 

He waved a hand at you from the tub, signalling that you could leave. “I suppose. Who is he marrying again?”

 

“Doe eyed girl from the west. You liked her, thought they’d be a good match and would have very cute children.”

 

“Ah yes. Her. Alright you can go. I assume you have lots of errands for today with there being a wedding and all. What will I do whilst free from your eagle eyed gaze?”

 

“I do but as normal my priority is to serve you. King’s orders and all that. I shall return in an hour to ensure that you are dressed and ready to go.” You curtsied and left the bedchambers, leaving Taehyung alone to bathe in peace.

 

***

 

You were still working out if the King hated you or if you really were the only person who could put up with the devilish Prince Taehyung. In front of the court and the villagers he was the bright eyed, innocent little Prince, apple of his father’s eye, a young man who obeyed by all rules and as a bonus, was handsome to boot. Behind closed doors however, that facade dropped. He was a mischief maker, always pushing the rules and testing the servants. He’d bedded almost every court lady and pissed off all of his brothers except Jimin. He outright refused to attend family dinners when his eldest brother Jin was visiting and if he ever got caught he would instantly blame his younger brother Jungkook. The one brother he toed the line with was Yoongi, he’d worked out not to mess with him the hard way.  

 

He’d gotten away with his devilish antics for many many years. Then you came along. Originally you were sent to serve the youngest brother, Jungkook, and you had been doing just that when Taehyung had tried to blame stealing food from a visiting court official on the young boy. You watched as poor Jungkook was reprimanded in front of the court, only intervening when his father visited his chambers later that night to make sure Jungkook was ok. You chose that moment to speak up, and in hindsight it could have been the last thing you did within the castle walls but you’d be damned if you had to care for a crying Jungkook when he’d done nothing wrong.

 

Just like that you’d been told that you were to serve Taehyung instead, and to keep him in line. The King allowed you to scold and reprimand the prince as you saw fit, something Taehyung did not appreciate. The first time he tried to place blame on one of his brothers for something he’d done you took his dinner away. He’d screamed and shouted and threatened to have you thrown out of the castle but you’d simply stood there and waited for his tantrum to pass.  “Simply apologise and you can have your meal.”

 

He’d huffed and grumbled under his breath, something about the utter disrespect you had for the crown then disappeared for the night, presumably to another court lady’s bedchambers.

 

***

 

“I hate you.” He snapped.

 

“Why? I’m a delight.”

 

“You are anything but a delight. I truly, truly hate you.” His words were poisonous but you were immune.

 

“Well tough. I’m the only one who will put up with your antics.” You sighed and stared down at him. “I grow weary of this conversation. Do we have to have this exchange every time I catch you doing something un-princely? It’s unbecoming.”

 

“Sod off.”

 

“You wound me. Now get up. You are a Prince and it’s time to act like one. Your brother is about to be wed and you have to stand next to your brothers and look happy about it. I know you are actually happy for Jimin so you can put up with the others for him. As soon as the ceremony is completed you can run off and ignore your family like you usually do.”

 

“You’d do the same if you had my family.” He whined.

 

You were over it. You’d come to collect him for the wedding and found him on the floor at the foot of his bed half dressed and refusing to put is boots on. Some days you swore he was nine years old and not in his twenties. “Who knows. I wouldn’t know what having a family is like. Now. Get. Up.” He stood slowly, avoiding your gaze. You did up the buttons of his jacket and placed the sash in place. You could see his chewing on his bottom lip as you worked, a telltale sign that he had something to say but he was trying to find the right moment to say it. “Just say it Tae.”

 

He hung his head in shame. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had no family.”

 

“You often don’t consider others’ feelings when you act. Something to work on hmm?” He nodded. “I accept your apology. Now hurry up or you’ll be late.” You patted his shoulder and gathered a few other items in the room that he’d need, boots, gloves and a ring.

 

He’d been quiet since your outburst which was unlike him. He usually had an endless supply of barbs for you until you either got him in line or made him laugh. Either way, there was never silence. “C-can I see you after the ceremony?” He asked softly.

 

“Why would you want to do that?” You asked, confused.

 

“Well, you’ve been serving me for almost two years now and I’m realising that I know nothing about you.” He sighed deeply. “I should know more about you.” He finally lifted his gaze to you, his eyes staring at you with a softness you hadn’t seen before.

 

“I’m not sleeping with you Taehyung.” You deadpanned.

 

He burst out laughing. “I promise, I have no desire to sleep with the woman who scolds me on a regular basis, I honestly just think after two years I should have known that you had no family. You know I never mean to offend you, you’re just the only person who throws it back at me and well, I don’t want to say anything genuinely horrible to you. You’re probably my only friend in this whole place though I’d never admit that to anyone else.”

 

“It’s nice when you remind me that you are human. Meet me in your library after the ceremony and we’ll talk while you make good on that promise to teach me to read.” You smiled and left the room with the young Prince in tow. There was hope for him yet.

 


	10. Falling Away From You

Prompt: Yoongi + “Hold on, you died” “Yeah, well it didn’t stick.”

Setting/AU: Fallen Angel

Warnings: Angst, character death, blood, angelic justice, dark themes, substance abuse, attempted assault, torture.

Word Count: 1265

 

Nothing could erase the pain you felt about that day. That day that you never spoke about, no one would believe you even if you told them anyway. What kind of normal self respecting person would believe that everyone had a guardian angel? And on top of that, even if you got them to believe that, who would believe that you had witnessed three other angels murder your guardian angel while an archangel watched? No one, that’s who.

 

 

So you compartmentalised in order to function day to day. You tried to keep those horrific images at the back of your mind but no matter how well you pushed them aside during the day, the nights were always hell. You glanced over at your bedside table, reaching for the sleeping pills and vodka - not the best mixture but it was the only thing that worked to put you into dreamless sleep. One or the other put you to sleep but you would be trapped in the nightmare of reliving the agonising screams as he was torn apart piece by piece. 

 

You’d tried therapy but that only resulted in you narrowly avoiding being committed to a facility. Shrinks pretty much just ticked the delusional and crazy boxes if you mentioned seeing angels, let alone speaking to them. 

 

***

 

Traditionally they weren’t meant to interact with humans. They were meant to watch over them and try to ensure their safety through subtle influence, never direct approach. Trust Yoongi to get paired with a girl who did not grasp the concept of subtle. He’d leave small hints towards ways to improve her health or direct her on the right path but she was so oblivious it made him scream.

 

“You were sent to test me, like some cruel punishment for excelling at my job for so many years.” He muttered as you walked past a whole block of health food stores to buy donuts. “I’m sure that concept…what do humans call it? Ah yes, Darwinism, I’m sure you are an example of that. A poor example but still an example.”

 

He would watch you every day as you made your way through life. You would have died 11 times before your 21st birthday if he hadn’t been on constant alert. You were clumsy, oblivious to traffic, unassuming and so gullible that really his only down time was when you were asleep. He had to admit though, that despite all of your faults and apparent death wish, you were quite charming.

 

You had an allure about you that made him gradually overstep the clearly defined boundaries between a guardian angel and their charge. Years passed and he came to know the feeling as infatuation. He knew he should report this to his superiors and be re-assigned but he didn’t want to mar his perfect record and he didn’t want to actually admit out loud that he was developing feelings for a human.

 

If only that man hadn’t tried to take what he had no right to. Yoongi watched as you didn’t see the mugger, you didn’t notice him following you until his knife was against your throat. Yoongi tensed, using every bit of inner strength that his ancient being had to not intervene. You threw your bag to the ground and kicked it away from you in the hopes that the mugger would take it and run but he pushed you against the wall, keeping the knife pressed at your throat as he tried to pull your pants down. Yoongi just could not stand idly by and watch you get violated by this lowlife.

 

In a burst of light he appeared, the shadow of his wings rising ominously up the brick walls of the alley. He slammed his palm into the man’s forehead and yelled at you to close your eyes. Terrified, you followed his order and shielded your eyes from the blinding light that emanated from the muggers eyes and mouth. Only when the light faded and his body slumped to the ground did you dare open your eyes.

 

Staring back at you with soft chocolate brown eyes was Yoongi. That was the start of his downfall. The first step towards falling for a human.

 

***

 

You’d had a shitty day. Your boss had yelled at you for something that wasn’t your fault, a customer had spat at you, you’d broken a nail and you’d missed your train. You couldn’t afford a cab so you had to walk all the way home in the rain so, of course, you didn’t have an umbrella.

 

Drenched and grumpy, you cracked open the vodka before you got home. You stumbled through the front door, tripping over your feet. As you fell your only thought was to not spill the vodka because you knew you were fucked up enough to lick it off the floor and even drunk you knew that was a new low for you.

 

The collision with the floor didn’t happen. Instead a pair of hands caught you. It took a moment for you to register that you hadn’t hit the floor and that you should be alone before you tried to scream. A hand quickly covered your mouth and you heard a voice trying to talk to you.

 

“Hey, calm down. Please, it’s me. It’s Yoongi. Will you just look at me.”

 

You froze. That name, you hadn’t uttered that name in months and no one, not even your shrink knew the name. Slowly you tried to focus your eyes on the figure. Dark hair came into focus, then pale skin and deep, intense eyes. It looked like him but it couldn’t be him. He was gone, taken from you forever.

 

A single tear slid down your face as you stared at him. He looked so much like your Yoongi and it hurt. You cursed your mind for making you see him and you shook your head. He slowly dropped his hand. “You’re not him.” You choked out.

 

He wiped your tear and held your face in his hands. “It is me. I’m sorry I’ve been gone for so long but I’m here and I promise you I’m not leaving again. It just took me a bit longer than planned to get back to you.” His deep voice flowed through you, warming the darkest parts of your soul and mending the wound that had refused to heal since he’d been taken from you.

 

Maybe you’d finally gone crazy or maybe he was actually here. Maybe after all these months Yoongi had somehow cheated death and returned to you. If being crazy meant you got to feel his touch and hear his words again then you would happily be crazy. What you needed though was an explanation. “Hold on, you died.”

 

“Yeah, well it didn’t stick.” He rasped.

 

“But how are you here now?”

 

“I barely survived what they did to me. After you passed out they lost interest in me and left me to die of my wounds. Only you could see me so passers by took you to hospital but I was left there. I dragged myself for blocks until I found somewhere to hole up and heal. I was so used to angelic healing power that I didn’t know how to treat myself. An old priest happened upon me and could see me - he helped nurse me back to health and taught me how to live as a human. I couldn’t come back to you as the broken being I was. I promised myself that as soon as I was healed and could protect us, I’d find you.”

 


	11. Do the Job

Prompt: Chen + “I don’t want to be lady-like. I want to lure men to their death.” + “I swear this isn’t what it looks like.”

Setting/AU: Con-Man

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1298

 

“I don’t get why you’re so worked up over this.” Chen stood across the room packing the tools he’d need into his bag and checking his suit for umpteenth time. “We’re given a job and we do it, simple.”

 

“Of course you don’t. You’re not always, and I mean _always_ given the job of either playing a damsel in distress or a seductress. No _you_ get to have a hand in planning your jobs. Don’t think I haven’t overheard you negotiating with Hyuk.” You pouted. You knew the gesture was childish and would get you nowhere with Chen but you were fed up with constantly putting on the figure hugging dresses that showed far too much cleavage and leg, leaving nothing to the imagination or the flowy, delicate dresses that hid everything and meant you had to act weak and in need of the help of a man. Both options brought out creeps and made you hate men a little more every time you did a job. Chen on the other hand got to partake in these elaborate schemes, long cons as they were known to those in the life, and you were envious.

 

“You think we don’t all start out like that?” He ran his hand through his hair, the only sign of his frustration that this conversation was happening. With a sigh he walked back across the room and stood in front of you. “Do you have any idea how many women I had to pretend to fall madly in love with or seduce with promises to rock their worlds - only to steal their shit as soon as we were in a room alone?” He shook his head as if to try and shake the memories out. “The first year or two is just those jobs sweetheart. You’ll get the easy marks while Hyuk sees you grow and learn to hold your own better. You need unwavering confidence and charisma to pull off the other stuff.” He smiled gently at you. “Well, that and a knack for getting out of tough spots when everything goes wrong.”

 

You huffed and moved to pack your own bag. Make no mistake, you were pissed that you had to fulfil the seductress role again but Chen was right about one thing - you got given a job and you did it. You’d seen what happened when people refused the job or didn’t complete it to Hyuk’s expectations… well actually you hadn’t, you just knew that you never saw those people again so you could only assume the worst. Being a con artist was lucrative work and you weren’t naive enough to think that Hyuk just let them go back out into the real world after knowing about his small band of criminals. Not that any of you would call yourselves criminals. After all, when you did a job properly the takings were practically a gift given to you by your mark. A better word would be savant or opportunist.

 

You were doing a two person con tonight and you always enjoyed working with Chen. He was incredibly good at what he did. Art theft, counterfeiting, bonds forgery, securities fraud and racketeering were just a few things in his impressive skill set. He went by the name Chen now but you knew it wasn’t his real name. When you first arrived at Hyuk’s compound Chen was serving time for bonds forgery in a con that went bad - the FBI had an inside man who recognised him and threw him under the bus. In true Chen fashion he didn’t complete his sentence. He escaped after a measly six months of his five year sentence had been served. You’d asked him how he escaped a max security prison when he’d arrived back to the compound only to be told “I walked out the front door sweetheart.”

 

You hadn’t believed him and hated the cocky bastard for a long time after that. It was the way he carried himself, always exuding confidence and that damn grin, cheeky and always promising a good time. His demeanor changed when he worked and the first time you’d seen him in action you gave his story of walking out the front door of the prison a little more stock. He’d donned a dapper suit and a pair of glasses and a completely different persona. Gone was the overconfident man you’d met and in his place was a handsome but softly spoken bookworm. He’d gone into the diamond exchange and asked a young woman for help in purchasing some diamonds so he could commission jewellery for his mother. You were in the diamond exchange too, trying to convince this guy that you’d give him the world if he got you more diamonds.

 

Your con was simple and served as a distraction for the staff, all except the young woman who was enamored by Chen. His new persona made sense when you heard her gushing over a book she’d read recently. You’d left the diamond exchange with $200k in diamonds but Chen had left empty handed but not remotely worried about it. A week later you’d woken up to a news story about the diamond exchange. A large blue diamond, the second rarest type in the world, had been stolen. At the time you thought it was a coincidence but what was sitting on Hyuk’s desk the next time you entered his office? A large blue diamond.

 

You’d learned quickly that coincidences in the con world did not exist and to never underestimate Chen because he always delivered.

 

***

 

In the car at hotel lobby the two of you continued your earlier discussion. “I don’t want to be lady-like. I want to lure men to their death.”

 

He laughed. “Then you might be in the wrong line of work. We’re con artists not assassins or mermaids.”

 

You shoved him lightly. “I just want something more than what I’ve been doing. It’s been over two years, surely I’ve advanced enough to be given something requiring a little more finesse by now?”

 

He turned to face you and cupped your face in his hands. “Sweetheart, you need to learn that even after you move past this seducing and damsel in distress work that you will continue to use your looks and prey on men’s weaknesses for pretty things. To be great at what you do you have to use everything you have to your advantage. I use my looks to disarm and charm my marks every time. It’s the oldest and simplest trick in the book. Your appearance, your charms and your body language are 85% of the con.”

 

You wanted to roll your eyes but deep down you knew he was right so you just sighed. He took that opportunity to end the discussion so that the two of you could get to work. He moved closer to you and murmured. “We can talk about it more later but we need to work now. Sarah is on her way over to the car and she looks pissed, she might even throw something at me - the least you could do is worry about me.” He smirked as you laughed lightly.

 

“You’re an ass. Brilliant, but an ass.”

 

He cooled his featured and stared at you with soft eyes. “Ready?” Your slight nod was the only indication you gave him but he saw it and moved. He pulled your face to his, closing the distance between the two of you as you kissed. He pushed you down on the back seat, moving to lie on top of you as the two of you deepened your kisses.

 

The door was flung open behind Chen and he turned, his face shocked and he instantly began pleading with his mark. “I swear this isn’t what it looks like.”


	12. Petty Arguments

Prompt: Baekhyun + “You didn’t do the dishes. I’m not doing you.”

Setting/AU: Domestic/canon

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1013

 

“Come on babe, are you really going to be this petty?”

 

You folded your arms and huffed, pretending to ignore him as best you could. A task that was easier said than done. He was incredibly gifted at making you notice him, he always had been. It was one of the things that drew you to him in the first place. Whenever he was in your vicinity all you could do was notice him. It drove you mad at first but over time he broke down your walls and you fell for him, hard.

 

“Please, don’t let this one little, insignificant thing ruin our evening.” He moved in front of you, effectively stopping you from leaving the room since he was now blocking the only exit unless you felt like escalating this argument and leaving out the window. That level of dramatics probably wasn’t necessary though.

 

He smiled at you, a smile that was a mix between sincere and smug, like he thought he’d already won and that pissed you off. You glared at him and poked his chest “You didn’t do the dishes. I’m not doing you.” One of his eyebrows raised, he grabbed your hand and pulled you close, a certain glint in his eye.

 

“Is that a challenge?” He asked with a low voice.

 

“No Baekhyun, it’s a statement. We had an agreement -” you started.

 

“Bet. We had a bet. There is a difference baby.” He interjected.

 

Growing increasingly frustrated you continued. “Whatever. We had a _bet_ and _you_ didn’t complete your task.”

 

“I DID complete my task. It’s not my fault that more dishes got used after I completed it.” He whined.

 

“A likely story.” You tried to step back but his arms held you in place. You didn’t want to give in, you always gave in, and just this once you wanted to prove a point to him. He always won when the two of you argued, not because he was in the right or because he could argue his point better, but because he’d disarm you with looks and touches until you caved and gave in to him. Every time you told yourself you’d resist him but every time he’d charm the pants off you.

 

“Baby come on, I did do the dishes. I promise. Why wouldn’t I? Sex was my prize so why wouldn’t I complete my side of the bet?” He cocked his head and slid his hands down to your hips, rubbing circles with his thumbs.

 

He never fought fair. He knew how he affected you and what his touch would do and he always used it to his advantage. It was a tried and true tactic of his. _He won’t distract me this time._ “Then why didn’t you take a photo when you’d finished doing them? What proof is there Baek? I did my part. I went out and bought all of the food for dinner, did the gardening and did all of the washing. All you had to do was tidy the house, vacuum and do the dishes.” You gripped his wrists and pulled them off you then stepped back out of his embrace. “The whole bet was your idea anyway. I just asked you to help out with the chores but you needed an incentive to do them. Whatever, I’m too tired for this right now.” You huffed and turned on your heel, making a beeline for the bedroom.

 

Baekhyun was smart enough not to follow you. He knew when you’d reached your limit with him and he knew that if he pushed you any further tonight he’d end up sleeping on the couch and on the receiving end of the silent treatment. He was only home for a couple more days and he desperately wanted to spend the entire time as close to you as possible. He missed you terribly when he was away on schedules. The long hours and weeks away from home made him crazy. One one hand he just wanted to hug you and do every activity under the sun with you just to see you smile but on the other he just wanted to spend all of his time in bed with you, snuggling, sleeping or fucking. Swallowing his pride he returned to the kitchen and did the dishes, for the third time today. He hadn’t brought up that he’d actually done them twice already today.

 

When he’d finished the dishes he took out the trash, did a little more tidying and then finally headed towards the bedroom he shared with you. You were curled up under the blanket and looked so peaceful that it made his heart swell. He stripped off his dirty clothes and slid under the covers behind you, pulling you closer to him as he spooned you. He let out a content sigh at the feeling of having you curled up against him, your warmth relaxing him. This was home.

 

He thought you were asleep until you shifted slightly, leaning back into his chest as you murmured. “I’m exhausted but I miss you and I want you. We both work too hard and forget to spend quality time together when we’re finally home.” You sighed. “I just need you to help out and share the cleaning and all of that domestic crap with me. I shouldn’t have to do it all alone.”

 

He kissed your cheek and held you close. “Shh, sleep baby. We’ll work out a roster in the morning, after I have my way with you, but for now… sleep. We’ll need all of our energy for what I want to do. I love you and I’m sorry I haven’t pulled my weight with the cleaning. I promise, I’ll make it up to you though.”

 

You drifted off in his arms, dreaming of the promises he’d made for the morning that you knew he’d follow through with. He would wake you up slowly and thoroughly, that much you were sure of.


	13. One Night

Prompt: Jungkook + “If you’re bored I can think of other ways to pass the time…” + “I’m going to take care of you.”

Setting/AU: Doctor AU

Warnings: nothing really, hospital setting, stitches, it’s mainly fluff though.

Word Count: 1259

 

“You can stay the night if you’d like. If you choose to stay we can either let you remain in the recovery ward alone or we can give you your own room, we’d just have to open a wing & call in a nurse in order to do so.”

 

You looked around the recovery ward you were in. As far as you could tell you were the only person in the ward. “Uh, I’d prefer to stay tonight if that’s ok. And if I’m the only patient in this ward I’m fine to just stay here. No need to call in a nurse this late at night.”

 

The nurse nodded and continued checking your vitals. “You’ll be looked after by our on call doctor, his station is at the end of this room so unless he’s called away he’ll be here all night to check on you. If he’s not in the room just press your call button and one of the nurses will come to you.”

 

You thanked her for looking after you so far and tried to focus your groggy eyes. Apparently you’d scared the nurses when they couldn’t wake you up post surgery. So much so that they’d called in a junior doctor to remain in the ward all night. You mother had assured them that it was normal - once you were asleep you were dead to the world - but they clearly didn’t believe her. It was a typical hospital ward, pale walls with around 10 beds, curtains for privacy if required and machines everywhere. At the far end of the room next to the bathroom was a small workstation. That would be the doctor’s station then you guessed.

 

The nurse let you know that your meal would arrive soon and that they could administer medication then. Then she left and you were alone in the big ward. You drifted off to sleep shortly after eating, your subconscious taking the reins and holding nothing back.

 

Your dreams were technicolour splashes and portals. People jumped through the portals, moving with  a fluidity reserved only for dancers and gymnasts. You felt like you were watching it all unfold, and the overarching message was speaking to you. Your dreams however, shifted, whether it was because of the heavy medication or the drips and monitors still attached to you or just your subconscious deciding it had been far too long since it freaked you the fuck out, you’d never know. Suddenly you were trapped in a room on a hospital bed. No matter how hard you hit the walls or yanked on the door you couldn’t escape. The room started shrinking and you thrashed about, trying to escape.

 

You woke up to the feeling of strong hands holding you still. “Hey, hey, calm down. You’re ok. I need you to stop trying to move or you’ll tear your stitches.” A calm voice broke through and you finally opened your eyes. The darkness of the ward reminded you of where you were and the concerned eyes staring down at you must have belonged to the junior doctor. You slowly relaxed your muscles and stopped trying to fight him, he let go of you when he felt you relax.

 

“I-I had a bad dream… sorry.” You mumbled.

 

“Don’t apologise, the anaesthetic mixed with the pain killers and the fact that you are alone in a hospital ward kind of make the perfect nightmare combo. If it’s ok I’d like to check your stitches to make sure you haven’t torn them.” You took in his appearance as he spoke, his dark hair swept up off his face, a gentle smile, white teeth, kind eyes. Maybe you were still drugged out of your mind but he was handsome, like incredibly handsome. Like TV doctor handsome.

 

He cleared his throat and asked again. You forgot to answer him the first time, too busy staring at him and all that. You nodded and he folded the blanket down to your hips. Something dawned on you and you grabbed his hand to halt his movements. You were still in a hospital gown, which meant you were only wearing panties and the gown and he had to check your abdomen. Your eyes darted around as you tried to calm yourself. He’s a doctor, he sees mostly naked people all the time and probably doesn’t think anything of it. He’s just trying to do his job. The logical thoughts battled it out with the emotional ones to no avail. What if he expects me to pull my gown down, i’m not being topless in front of him i don’t care how handsome he is.

 

“Hey, calm down. You can keep the gown on. I’m just moving the blanket down to your hips, then we can pull the gown up. You’ll still be covered, except for your abdomen, which is where I need to look. I won’t continue until you’re ready but I really need to check the stitches.”

 

You tried to steady your breathing, you’d take a deep breath if you could but you knew it would hurt too much. His words calmed you and he honestly seemed like he was trying to keep your modesty intact while he did his examination. You loosened your grip on his hand and moved your arms so that they rested just below your chest. “Sorry, I’m just really on edge for some reason.”

 

“It’s ok, like I said before, hospital ward at night plus medicines are a warzone for logic and stable emotions. I won’t take it personally.” He smiled at you and part of you melted. No one should have a smile that sweet. “Ready?”

 

“Yes Doctor…uhh what do I call you?”

 

“God, how rude of me. I’m Dr. Jeon, but you can call me Jungkook.”

 

“Ok Jungkook, I’m ready.”

 

“I’m going to take care of you” He reassured you. With one hand he held the blanket in place and with the other he slowly tugged your hospital gown up until he could see your abdomen. He leaned down closer to inspect the wound and lightly pressed your abdomen. “Tell me when it hurts ok?” He started to press closer to the wound and you hissed a breath. “Pain?”

 

“A little.”

 

“The stitches are intact and the swelling seems to be at a normal amount. You only have pain quite close to the wound so that’s nothing to worry about. I’ll just give you some more painkillers in about an hour.” He pulled your gown back down over your abdomen, then tucked it under the blanket before he pulled the blanket back up to your arms.

 

“An hour?” You whined.

 

He laughed. “If you’re bored I can think of other ways to pass the time…”

 

“I’m all ears Doc.”

 

“I have my laptop at my station. I can bring it over so you can watch netflix until the hour is up. No social media though, you’re far too drugged to be allowed on there. If you fall asleep I’ll just wake you when it’s time for the medicine. How does that sound?”

 

You smiled. “I’d like that. You can’t judge my choice in show though. That would be poor bedside manner.”

 

He laughed even harder as he walked off to fetch his laptop. “I wouldn’t dare. But, be a good patient and don’t judge my watch history or I will judge your choices.”


	14. Circus After Dark

Prompt: Minseok + “I promise I won’t bite. Unless you ask.” + “I hate you.” “Why? I’m a delight.”

Setting/AU: Circus

Warnings: Supernatural themes.

Word Count: 1440 

 

 

You weren’t sure what drew you back to this place but there was a pull inside of you that kept bringing you here. You’d leave your home or work to go for a walk and no matter what you’d always end up here. It first happened three weeks ago when your sister convinced you to come along to see the circus. You’d scoffed at the invitation and told her she could keep her animal cruelty display to herself. 

 

“It’s not that kind of circus dummy. As if I’d pay money to go watch depressed animals. This one is all people and it’s apparently amazing.” She pouted at you and grabbed your arm, shaking it desperately. “Pleeease I don’t want to go alone. It’s got a whole story and music and acts - can you please come with me?” 

 

You had to admit, you were intrigued. It had already won points with you by not having any animals in it but the idea of weaving live music and a story into the various acts was what was really winning you over. You did always love watching the acts as a child, you just hated walking past the cages of animals afterwards. You could just see the despair and sadness in their eyes and it made you cry.

 

You caved. “Fine. I’ll go with you but I swear to god if this isn’t amazing…”

 

Excitement spread across your sisters face and she couldn’t contain her joy even if she tried. “If this sucks we’ll do whatever you want ok? I’m talking getting wasted at a bar, marathoning movies, eating until we can hardly breathe, going to a play, whatever you want - I’ll do it. Well maybe… if I feel like it.” She only added that last part to rile you up and you knew it but it always worked.

 

Your thinly veiled sarcasm made its way past your lips before you could stop it. “I hate you.”

 

“Why? I’m a delight.” She grinned, flipped her hair over her shoulder and ran off before you could say anything else.

 

***

 

The moment the lights dimmed you knew you were in for something far different than what you’d expected. The music twisted the excited atmosphere of the big top into something darker. Surely everyone was feeling as on edge as you were right? Flashes of shadows made you jump, your eyes darting around to try and figure out what terror was about to unfold. Fog flooded the stage and a voiceover began to tell you the tale of a creature that was once a man. This creature could fly, could move at such speed, move its body in ways normal humans could not and, how it could capture your heart and mind with just a stare. What you were about to witness was its transformation from man to creature and the turmoil it felt.

 

A morose tune started to fill the big top and you felt a chill go down your spine. When the fog started to clear you could make out a man on stage playing the violin. The man moved about the stage fluidly, spotlights illuminating spots that he passed to reveal people dancing and doing acrobatics whilst performing the actions of everyday farm chores. That in itself amazed you.

 

Then you saw him.

 

The last spot illuminated a man who appeared to be dying. He was begging and praying as he staggered about the stage. He fell to his knees and a red spotlight illuminated behind him, obscuring the features of the man who was smirking as he walked up to the dying man. They shook hands and the room was plunged into darkness.

 

The rest of the show was a whirlwind of emotions as you witnessed this man die and be reborn as something else, something…other. The high aerial tricks and tumbling acts that depicted the creatures movements were phenomenal. Some of the performers appeared in more than one act - trapeze artists also joining in on the aerial silk acts, contortionists joining the tumblers, but the main performer was in every single act. How he was still standing at the end was beyond you.

 

One thing stood out in your memory and would remain there, crystal clear. About three quarters of the way through the show the man stood in front of your section and stared. You could have sworn he was staring at you so you looked around to see if anyone else seemed to be locking eyes with him only to come up short. Everyone else was watching the trapeze act, but not you. No, you were locking eyes with quite possibly the most stunning person you’d ever set eyes on.

 

You believed that he wasn’t human simply because people didn’t look like that. Everything about him drew you in. It was as though he was designed to make you forget that the world existed when he was around and like hell if he wasn’t having that effect on you. His stare bored through you and felt far too intimate for a big top with 4000 people in it.

 

***

 

Since that day you always ended up here. The first night was two days after the show and you’d gone out to pick up a snack from the store but instead you found yourself at the circus grounds. You spotted him and watched him stretching and getting ready.

 

The second night was a week later and you ran into him. He smiled gently at you as you profusely apologised for not watching where you were going before introducing himself as Xiumin then the two of you spoke briefly. You’d told him how you’d seen the show and that you thought it was incredible. He thanked you before heading in to resume the show after the intermission. You went home and all you could think of was him. Whenever you closed your eyes you saw him.

 

The third night was after another week. You’d tried to resist the urge to run off to the circus every night but walking home from work one day led you here. He spotted you and waved you over to his trailer, gesturing for you to sit and spend time with him. The two of you chatted about anything and everything but if you were honest with yourself all of the talk was white noise because whenever you looked at him and whenever he looked at you, you forgot what you were talking about because you just got lost in him. You craved him and you didn’t know why.

 

Tonight was the fourth night. It was much later than the other times you’d found yourself here. The show had ended an hour or so ago and you found yourself standing in front of his trailer. You were confused when you finally noticed where you were. The last thing you remembered was being at a bar with friends and excusing yourself from the crowded dance floor to pop outside for some air. Now you were here.You had no idea how far from here the bar was or what time you’d left. You were about to turn and leave when the door opened, revealing Xiumin in dress pants and a dark robe. He cocked his head and smirked at you. “What a pleasant surprise. Come in, please.” He stepped aside to allow you to enter but your feet remained rooted to the ground.

 

Noticing your apprehension he stepped forward and grabbed your hand, smiling gently. “Come on, it’s cold out here. Just come in and let me fix you some tea and we can chat. How does that sound?”  

 

You felt the tension leave your body and you found yourself smiling back at him. “That actually sounds really nice.” You paused , suddenly remembering your manners. “But oh! I don’t want to impose. I promise I -”

 

He cut you off. “Don’t worry about it. I honestly wasn’t doing anything - just sitting around waiting until it was time for me to rest so please believe me when I say that my evening has taken a turn for the better. Now, come on in.” He turned and stepped back inside his trailer, waiting for you to follow. This time you did.

 

The door shut behind you and locked. The look on Xiumin’s face had turned predatory as he advanced on you. The last words you heard before you gave in to the need that you felt were “I promise I won’t bite. Unless you ask.” 

 


	15. Practice Makes Perfect

Prompt: Jongdae + “I love you from the bottom of my heart but I don’t trust your cooking. Stay out of my kitchen.”

Setting/AU: Bakery

Warnings: none

Word Count: 964

 

If anyone asked you you’d tell them that you loved your boyfriend from the bottom of your heart. That your love for him grew each and every day to the point where you were certain that it was unhealthy. All of this was true, except for one omittance. Jongdae could not cook.

 

That wasn’t to say that he didn’t give it a red hot go from time to time but after the lemon chicken incident of 2015, the attempt at a birthday cake in 2017 and the countless times he’d tried to surprise you with breakfast in bed (burnt toast, chewy eggs, undercooked tomato and far too much salt) you’d refused to let him anywhere near the kitchen if you were capable to going in there yourself. 

 

“It’s not fair for you to do all of the cooking jagi.” he’d whined last time you kicked him out of the kitchen in your apartment.

 

“I don’t do all of the cooking, I let you grill meat and make rice.” You’d responded while suppressing a laugh.

 

“Aish…” He’d mumbled as he walked off towards the couch.

 

The funny thing was that he could cook perfectly if it was over an open flame in the outdoors but as soon as you put him inside, atrocities happened in the poor kitchen.

 

***

 

Work had been beyond busy for you. Ever since opening the small bakery a few months ago you and your team had been inundated with orders for pastries, cakes, muffins and breads. You’d opened it in the shopfront downstairs with your apartment residing above. It made it a lot easier on you when you had to get up before sunrise to start baking bread and it meant that your apartment always smelt delicious.

 

You’d expected to open and have a relatively quiet first few months until word of mouth got around town and more people came in but for some reason the universe decided to whittle that quiet period down to the first week and then increase exponentially from then onwards.

 

So it came as a surprise for you when you came back from a delivery after closing up one afternoon to find Jongdae in the kitchen of the bakery. Your heart skipped a beat as your anxiety set in. What was he doing? Had he broken any of the expensive equipment? _What was that smell?_ He looked up as you entered the kitchen and grinned. You ran your eyes over him as you searched for any sign of injury. He appeared to have all of his fingers intact and nothing appeared to be burning but this did nothing to ease your nerves. “Babe,” you started. “What are you doing?”

 

His smile widened. “I found something I wanted to make but our oven isn’t big enough so i came down here to use the bigger one.”

 

“Babe…”

 

“Before you tell me ‘I love you from the bottom of my heart but I don’t trust your cooking. Stay out of my kitchen.’ can you please hear me out?” 

 

You took a moment to glance at the oven, noting that it didn’t have smoke pouring out of it and nothing smelled like it was burning. Taking a deep breath you turned your attention back to Jongdae. “I’ll try.”

 

He stepped forward and took your fidgeting hands in his, rubbing his thumbs over the back of your palms as he tried to ease your nerves. “I think I found something I can make. I made it too big which is why I needed this oven but I think it’s going well so far.” He explained.

 

“What are you making?”

 

“I want you to guess. What can you smell?”

 

You sniffed the air and pushed away the normal scents of the bakery. “Hmm melting cheese? Tomato? and some form of dough?”

 

He nodded vigorously. “Guess!”

 

“Wait. Babe are you making pizza?” You couldn’t help but smile at how pleased he looked with himself. He’d cooked food and it actually smelled how it was supposed to. That never happened indoors. “And you promise you made it? You didn’t just buy it and throw it in our oven to reheat?”

 

He scoffed. “The mess upstairs should shed light on the truth.”

 

You groaned at the thought of your little kitchen covered in flour and dough, flecks of tomato paste on the splashback and cheese littered all over the bench tops and floor. As you did an internal calculation of how long it would take you to clean up both kitchens a little alarm went off on his phone. “It’s done! PIZZA!” He yelled.

 

You refused to let him get it out of the oven, reminding him of the times he’d burned his hands or dropped the pan because it was too hot, so you grabbed the oven mits and removed the pizza from the oven.

 

It looked and smelled amazing, so amazing that it had you salivating. “This actually looks good.”

 

Jongdae pretended to be offended as he stood behind you, pulling you into a hug after you placed the tray down. He nuzzled your neck as he spoke. “I don’t like that you cook all day then have to come home and cook for me too. I want to get better so I can cook at least three nights per week for us.”

 

You smiled. He really did try and even if he was laughable bad in the kitchen he was nowhere near the walking disaster that he once was. He was trying to improve his skills and it warmed your heart that he cared enough to try. “Who doesn’t love pizza?”

 


	16. Whiskey

**Prompt: Baekhyun + “What? Does that feel good?” + “It’s only one night, we’ll just share the bed.”**

**Setting/AU: Bartender**

**Warnings: some swearing, alcohol.**

**Word Count: 2,077  
**

“Do you plan on moping at my bar all evening?” He teased as he poured you another whiskey.

 

You cocked your eyebrow. “And if I am?”

 

He chuckled, sliding your glass towards you. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m always happy to see you but you’re mood is keeping the customers away. You can stay but… maybe for the future success of my business could you move down that end?”

 

You looked to where he’d inclined his head, your eyes widening. “To the dark end of the bar? Real nice Baek. I’m not drunk enough to not be offended that you’re sequestering me to the area you usually reserve for curmudgeons.”

 

Baekhyun shrugged. “Can I convince you with free whiskey for the rest of the night?”

 

“And you wonder why you aren’t making big enough profits, giving away free top shelf booze…” You slid off your stool in the center of the bar and moved closer towards the dark end of the bar but you refused to place yourself at the very end, lest you admit to yourself that tonight you were in a sour mood and that you could give two shits about the other patrons. You just wanted to come and unload your troubles on your friendly neighbourhood bartender.

“I might not be a business mastermind but I’m not half bad with math and from where I’m standing the group of eight women who have been staring at my cocktail menu for the last 20 minutes while side-eyeing you are probably going to spend more money than if I charge you for the next five or six whiskeys you’ve got left in you before you need to be carried to a taxi.”

 

***

 

You enjoyed watching Baekhyun work. No matter how bad your mood was, and today it was particularly bad, he calmed you. He had a light hearted nature and the ability to talk to anyone as well as really listen to them, which is what made him an excellent bartender. He knew the bar like the back of his hand so watching him fluidly move around to pour drinks and make cocktails with flair was enthralling.

 

He hadn’t been wrong. The group of girls were three things – loud, annoying and in need of an endless supply of cocktails. The latter was great for Baekhyun but it was really infringing on your night because their endless cocktail orders were keeping him so busy that he barely had time to chat to you. He’d come down your end of the bar to refill your drink and check up on you but he had to keep excusing himself from any attempt at conversation every time a loud screechy voice called out _Baekkieeeee!_ or _bartenderrrrrr!_ and you were getting pretty close to snapping at them. You’d had a shitty week and you’d come to this particular bar to see the one person capable of lifting your spirits only for this pack of drunk wretches to steal him from you.

 

To top things off somehow, even at the dark end of the bar, sleazy guys still somehow found you and insisted on hitting on you. You weren’t exactly sure which part of woman sitting alone at the dark end of the bar drinking whiskey and scowling read _Hi, I’d really love to engage in small talk and fake compliments, maybe a drink or two, then definitely I’ll have sex with you_ but no matter how many you sent off muttering about how much of a bitch you were more kept appearing.

 

“Ok now I need to know what you’re saying to all of the men who keep trudging up to the bar to order a failure beer.” Baekhyun’s amused voice sounded in front of you.

 

You looked up from your glass confused. “Failure beer?”

 

He grinned as be stood up straight and put of his salesperson voice. “A failure beer is something a person orders after they have tried to pick up and haven’t been successful. They present at the bar with a defeated look on their face while muttering bitterly about whoever just told them ‘thanks but no thanks’ in varying degrees of politeness. Now normally this results in more drinking and then either more failure beers or, in some cases, a success beer.”

 

“Well apparently the dark end of the bar is no longer curmudgeon central, it’s evidently the new place to try and pick up chicks. Even when they show zero interest in you.” You waved a hand disinterestedly in the direction of the small dance floor. “I simply told them _no_.”

 

Baekhyun rested his elbows on the bar as he watched you, a knowing smile on his face. “It had to be more than just _no_ with the way they’ve been muttering.”

 

You smirked. “Each one gets a new version of _no_ and when they try to ignore the first _no_ it doesn’t end well for them.”  

“What? Does that feel good?” He chuckled. Right as you went to answer one of eight screeching harpies called out and he sighed. “Making money off them is nice but holy fuck are they annoying. I’ll be back as soon as I can be, you still have two free whiskeys before you’re at your usual limit.” He smiled and made his way back down the bar towards the increasingly drunk and flirty harpies.

 

You continued to watch as he brushed off their advances with ease, somehow not pissing them off and sure as hell not deterring them. Sure, you’d had a handful of guys try and hit on you over the course of the night but after you got rid of them they never came back whereas Baekhyun was entering into the third hour of resisting these women.

 

You couldn’t blame them for trying. He was incredibly attractive. He fell somewhere between boy next door handsome and bad boy you know you shouldn’t get involved with and that was alluring. The silver hair and eyeliner didn’t hurt either. There was no harm in ogling the bartender. You had no plans to make any advances on him and you were sure he had no interest in you like that.

 

***

 

“Since when do you have a second bartender?” you asked.

 

“He only started recently but he’s been doing really well on the slower nights so I figured I’d give him a Friday night to really test him out.” Baekhyun was leaning against the bar watching Jongin work. “He’ll be able to fend off the women and somehow still make a massive tip at the end of the night.”

 

You chuckled, words slurring slightly. “And how about you mister? Going home with one of those persistent women from earlier?”

 

“Fuck no. I _was_ going to finally hear the end of your story but it seems, little miss drunky, that I’ll be putting you into a taxi instead.” He furrowed his brow. “I could have sworn I only gave you six drinks.”

 

“Oh you did. You’re forgetting the guys that hit on me. They arrive with drinks.” You grinned lopsidedly as you started to feel the alcohol really hit you. Mixing drinks was a stupid idea and you knew it but at the time you really hadn’t cared.

 

He ran his hands through his hair. “Of course. You idiot, mixing drinks. What was it? Vodka and whiskey?”

 

You nodded. “Yup!”

 

He chuckled and shook his head. “Alright you, let’s get you a taxi so I can send you home safely.”

 

You pouted. “But you haven’t heard the end of the story yet.”

 

A loud male voice projected over the noise of the bar. “There’s a massive storm about to hit, if you haven’t called a taxi yet you aren’t getting one until it passes.”  

 

You looked up at Baekhyun as he cursed under his breath. He disappeared to talk to Jongin and a security guard before coming back to you. “What was that about?” You asked.

 

“I had to organise for Jongin to keep the bar open with not let anyone in. Security will have discretion for if they let anyone in once the storm hits. You aren’t going to get a taxi in time so you have two choices.” You cocked your head to the side as he spoke. “Option one, you stay here and drink water for the rest of the night until the storm passes and you can get a taxi or, option two, you come upstairs – I live above the bar by the way – and hang out with me. You can still drink water but you’ll also be able to finish your story and you won’t have to scare any more of my patrons.”

 

For your drunk brain it was an incredibly simple choice, you wanted to finish telling the cute bartender about your shitty week. It didn’t even register with you that he was inviting you up to his place until you were being led up to his door. You ungracefully turned and, would have fallen if not for Baekhyun catching you in his arms, looked up at him and slurred. “No funny business ok?”

 

He laughed and turned you back around so that he could keep walking you to his door so he could unlock it. “Don’t worry about it. You are too drunk for me to be interested.”

 

So while the insane thunderstorm and flash flooding hit the city you sat comfortably on Baekhyun’s sofa semi-coherently telling him about your week. Lucky for you he was pretty fluent in drunk person speak so he managed to follow most of the conversation. He’d made sure to keep refilling your glass of water and gave you pain killers when you started to sober up.

 

At some point his gracious hospitality dawned on you and you had to break the comfortable silence that had settled between the two of you. “Thank you by the way. You could have just left me down in the bar but for some reason you took the surly drunk upstairs to listen to her problems. Clearly there’s something wrong with you but nevertheless, thank you.”

 

He smiled gently as you spoke. “You’re more than welcome. I’d like to think my ability to read people is still intact, the only reason I invited you up here was because you’re a semi-regular and I’m pretty sure you aren’t a serial killer or anything terrifying like that. You’re interesting. Most people who sit at the bar to drink their problems away have either relationship issues or money issues but you’re a different breed. It’s refreshing.” He tried to stifle a yawn as he spoke but it managed to escape. “Shit, sorry. I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to stay up and it doesn’t sound like the storm is heading anywhere anytime soon.”

 

Taking the hint you stood up slowly and started to collect your things. “Don’t stay up on my behalf. I’ll just head back down to the bar and wait out the storm. Thanks again for talki-”

He grabbed your arm, silencing you, then let it go. “Don’t read into this but, you are welcome to stay if you want. I only have one bed but I promise to keep my hands to myself if you do.”

 

“I can sleep on the sofa, it’s no trouble really.” Truth be told you weren’t sure if you could trust your mostly sober self to keep your hands to yourself if you were sharing a bed with him. If you found him attractive when he was working you sure as hell hadn’t been prepared for how much more appealing he was up close sprawled on his sofa.

 

“It’s only one night, we’ll just share the bed.” He shrugged. “Plus, rainy nights are perfect for snuggling.” He grinned as he saw your resolve crumble. How could you resist when he kept making the idea of sharing a bed so enticing? 

 

“Fine, but if I get frisky you only have yourself to blame, plying me with free alcohol.” You giggled.

 

He smirked at you. “You said no funny business, don’t go tempting a man if you aren’t prepared to follow through."

 

You started to walk towards the hallway that would inevitably lead to his bedroom and looked over your shoulder. “Who says I can’t do both?”


	17. Cognitive Dissonance

**I am still doing these sporadically. I have 8 to go!**

**Prompt: Chanyeol + “You have a cold, you’re not dying.” + “It’s only one night, we’ll just share the bed.”**

**Setting/AU: Cyborg/Futuristic**

**Warnings: none**

**Word Count: 1687**

“I think I’m dying. Chanyeol hurry. I need you to take down my final wishes.” Your body ached from the constant coughing and your nose couldn’t make up its mind as to whether it wanted to be runny or blocked. You were pretty sure you’d slept most of the week away but no matter how hard you tried to focus on anything, the fuzzy feeling washed over you and you’d wake up a few hours later in an incredibly uncomfortable position.

 

 

As far as you were concerned, you were dying. This was your body’s final fight against whatever bacteria had infected your system and your body was losing. _Make sure you get a X488 shot_ your mother had nagged and nagged. Of course, you neglected to get one. The shot only inoculated you against one strain of the disease, and it mainly afflicted the elderly and the infantile.

 

“You have a cold, you’re not dying.” came the emotionless response from Chanyeol. Really you shouldn’t have expected sympathy from him. He just wasn’t programmed that way. When you’d found him he was barely held together but you’d rescued his half scavenged form and had slowly but surely rebuilt him. He wasn’t like the cyborgs you would find on any street, those had the emotional AI programming chips that allowed them to pass as humanoid. Until you spoke with one for a length of time you probably wouldn’t work out that they were a cyborg. Not Chanyeol though, no, he was without a doubt, not human. One day you’d come across a programming chip for him but you’d mostly warmed up to his blunt manner of speech. It, however, did not make for great bedside manner. The 6ft, blue haired, emotionally stunted cyborg was all you had so he’d have to suffice.

 

 

“If I wasn’t on the brink of death I’d get you back for that.” you mutter. You didn’t need cheek from a hunk of metal and computer chips. You needed someone to bring you soup, to make sure you took your meds, to hack the network and show you a movie your mother always put on for you when you were sick as a kid. Trust illness to bring out the needy side of you.

 

 

“Finally, someone whose life is more pathetic than mine.” he muttered. Maybe it was the fever but you were sure that the emotionless robot just sassed you. As far as you were aware, he was fully functional but unable to feel emotion or respond in a conversational way. He could only respond with logic and a severe monotone. He shouldn’t be capable of muttering, nor forming an obtuse opinion like the one he had just uttered.

 

 

You glared at him, as best as any pathetic sick person can glare at someone, from your semi prone position under your required three blankets. According to Chanyeol, three blankets were required for the bedridden and no matter how many times you tried to remove a layer he always replaced it.

 

 

Being sick made you moody and emotional, two things you tried very hard not to be in your day to day life. There was no place for moody and emotional in the scavenging business. After fixing Chanyeol to 90% of his former glory he’d remained with you, citing that he’d leave once a better option made itself available to him. He’d been a military programmed bot, special forces from the intricate wiring you found inside, as well as the larger number of chip slots. Scavengers had removed his weapons and fighting chips as well as the tactical and behavioural ones too. Somehow you’d managed to condition him to recognise warning signs, for when you needed food, rest, patching up, assistance and someone to talk to. The last one was still a work in progress, and would remain so until you could get your hands on a chip. Apparently dismantling another cyborg just for the chip was immoral, he’d flat out refused this as an option every time you brought it up.

 

 

He finished making your dinner, chicken and vegetable stew, and brought your tray over to you. He waited as you sat up in the bed, repositioning the pillows so that you were propped up and able to eat, then placed the tray in your lap. For a robot he was a pretty good cook. You kept forgetting the skills programming that most bots had these days. They all had the I-Serve-U-Bot base model, from the initial house maid prototypes, and had been build up from there. Some got military upgrades and served the country they were programmed to while others were programmed as fully functional AI, able to learn and adapt to their environment.

 

 

In a vaguely human action Chanyeol held up a finger to prevent you from starting your meal as he disappeared back to the kitchen. Small things like this made you forget that he didn’t have the proper chip to elicit these actions. Maybe if you weren’t sick you’d have picked up on it. When he returned he has two slices of buttered bread and a glass of juice for you. “Now you can eat.” You chuckled at his direction but followed it anyway.

 

 

You didn’t realise how hungry you were until you started eating and soon enough your bowl was empty. You pushed the tray forward and licked your lips, savouring the taste of the hearty meal. “Thanks Chan. I really needed that.”

 

 

“I also made brownies if you wish to have dessert.” He stated as he collected your tray, taking it back to the kitchen. You’re pretty sure you start salivating at the mere mention of your favourite dessert. How he knew is beyond you but honestly, you don’t care. All you know is that you have a great need and only brownies can satiate it. Your face must tell him that you do in fact want dessert because he nods before leaving the room. “I’ll just reheat one for you.”

 

 

“Chanyeol, you’re the only one who understands me.” You call out as he disappears from view.

 

 

“Yes, but it doesn’t mean I care.” The response was unexpected and after you stop laughing you realised it wasn’t something he’d usually say. The more you ponder on his responses as of late, the more you realise that they are decidedly more human. Something he should be unable to comprehend. Another coughing fit prevents you from dwelling on the thought.

 

 

When he returns he has a bowl with two warm brownies and ice cream in one hand and a glass of water in the other. He must have heard you coughing and decided that you required further hydration. He places the bowl in your hands and stands next to the bed with the glass of water.

 

 

“Dude, sit down, you’re looming ominously.” You move over slightly to allow him sufficient space to sit.

 

 

“I am not looming ominously. I was just waiting for you to finish the food so I could give you the water.” He responded.

 

 

You chuckled and started to eat the brownies. “Regardless, please sit? It’ll make me feel better. Holy shit, these are good.”

 

 

“They are a simple recipe. I understand that chocolate and cake makes humans feel good and there are an amalgam of the two so I deduced that they might assist in restoring your health.”

 

 

“You _do_ care about me.” You teased.

 

 

A pair of large eyes stared back at you. They weren’t real, you knew that, the one red eye basically yelling _I’m a cyborg!_ “Tell me something Chan.” You started.

 

 

“You need to be more specific. I know an infinite number of things.”

 

 

“When did you start learning the nuances of my speech? I haven’t found the right chip for you yet.” You asked. You might not be at your brightest right now but you weren’t so sick that you hadn’t noticed the shift in his behaviour… or the fact that he even had behaviours now.

 

 

“The last upgrade you did had a small inbuilt AI chip. It’s allowed me to process small amounts of speech and learn the emotional patterns that go with it.” The response was almost sheepish, as though he thought you might be mad with him.

 

 

You held out your hand for the water which he handed to you. “Why didn’t you tell me?” you asked in between sips.

 

 

“It didn’t seem relevant.” He chuckled as you handed the glass back to him, which startled you since he’d never done that before. The sound wasn’t horrible but it was foreign to you. “After all, you kept insisting that you were dying.”

 

 

You had no response to that, too floored by the sass that your previously stock standard cyborg had not been equipped with. You decided to just focus on the brownie, because you understood chocolate and ice cream and right now you did not understand Chanyeol.

 

 

He moved to get up once you finished your dessert but you grabbed his arm, stopping him. “Stay, I have more questions for you Chan.”

 

 

He placed the bowl on the floor next to the bed along with the glass of water. “You will be asleep in the next ten minutes.” You cocked your head at him. “It is the average time you remain conscious after ingesting nutrients. I’ve observed this over the past few days.”

 

 

“Then stay until I sleep, you creep. I have questions.” He sighed as he moved his body to sit next to you. Real or not, it was nice to have the body heat next to you. You shifted your body closer to his. “Warm” you muttered as you draped your arm across his torso. You started asking him about the AI chip and what it had allowed him to learn. He responded to your questions bluntly, proving to you that just because he had started to pick up on emotion, he sure as hell hadn’t mastered it yet. His warmth was making you sleepy but you had no intention of moving away from his form. “It’s only one night, we’ll just share the bed.” You whined when he tried to get up.

 

 

“I fail to see the point of this. My knowledge of medical text does not cite this as a legitimate remedy for illness.” Good to know that he wasn’t fully capable of artificial intelligence yet. The small chip only did so much it seemed.

 

 

“Shut up and comfort me. I’m dying after all.”

 

[Drabble Game](https://xiubaek13.tumblr.com/post/169371761895/closed-1000-followers-drabble-game)


	18. Stalling Time

**Prompt: Yixing + “Shut up and kiss me already.”**

**Setting/AU: Vet  
**

**Warnings: Injured animal, memory of death of a pet.  
**

**Word Count: 2,340**

**A/N: I put trigger warnings for this drabble because an animal is in an accident, and there is a flashback to a pet passing away.**

 

 

 

 

 

 

You weren’t sure how you even made it to the animal hospital without crashing since you could hardly see through your tears as you drove. You loved animals more than people so naturally you were beside yourself when you saw a dog run out into open traffic and saw the car that didn’t swerve out of the way in time. The screeching sound of tires followed by a small thump would be forever etched into your mind. Nothing you would ever see would be worse than that, you were sure of it.

 

 

But when the driver didn’t stop, your shock went to rage and despair. You stopped in the middle of the highway, got out of your car, ignoring the cacophony of horns behind you, and collected the poor animal. It was still alive, thankfully the car had mostly swerved out of the way but from the whimpers coming from the injured animal, you knew it was hurt. You carried it back to your car and gingerly placed it on the backseat before driving off to the nearest vet you could find.

 

 

The tears started as your worry increased. What if the dog was more injured than you thought? What if it didn’t make it? You knew exactly how it felt to be on the receiving end of that kind of devastating news. As you drove you remembered that day vividly, you’d been twelve years old. You remembered how you’d arrived home from school and had found it odd that the house was so quiet. Usually your father was home and Danny, your best friend and family pet, would come bounding up to you. You wandered through the hall and into the backyard as you searched for either of them but found nothing. You had figured that maybe your father had taken Danny for a walk so you went about your business, did your homework and watched some TV.

 

 

As soon as your father walked in the door you knew something was wrong. Your eyes darted around, searching for Danny, but all you saw was the heartbroken expression on your fathers face. Your father was the strong one in the family, so seeing him like this broke you. He didn’t even need to say the words, the pained expression when you asked “Where’s Danny?” was enough to tell you that something horrible had happened.

 

 

“I’m so sorry honey,” He’d started, but you dropped to the floor before he could say anything else. He rushed over to you and cradled you in his arms as you sobbed, ignoring his own tears.

 

 

The dog in the back of your car would be ok, it had to be. You were trying to convince yourself that it would all be ok as you drove because you could not handle the idea of another child’s world being shattered like yours was.

 

 

You finally arrived at the animal hospital, parking horribly outside & definitely in a no parking zone but you didn’t care. You slowly lifted the dog out of the backseat and it whined at the movement, its eyes wide with fear and its body trembling. It absolutely broke your heart to see it suffering like this. “Shhh, we’re almost there ok?” You said, hoping your voice would calm the poor thing down. “We’re gonna get you fixed up so you can go home and live your best life ok?” You kept chatting away to the dog as it seemed like your voice was having a somewhat calming effect on it as you walked towards the doors of the hospital.

 

 

As soon as you entered a vet nurse rushed over to you and helped you place the dog on a small portable bed. You were thankful that there weren’t many people there so you were rushed ahead of the few that were waiting. When she tried to separate you and the terrified animal it panicked so she asked you to stay with it, so that the poor thing didn’t injure itself further. You agreed instantly, thinking if you were in it shoes you wouldn’t want to be alone.

 

 

You stayed while the vet came and assessed the severity of the dog’s injuries and you waited patiently in the waiting room when they finished prepping for surgery and put the little guy under. The waiting was the worst part, you didn’t know how long they’d be, if the lil guy would make it, who he belonged to, nothing. As though she could read your mind the vet nurse appeared and beckoned you over to the front desk. “Before we took him in I scanned him and found a microchip. I’m just going to look up the owner now so you don’t have to wait around any longer if you don’t want to.”

 

 

You shook your head. “I’ll stay. I need to know if he’s ok.” You said. She nodded, the understanding evident in her eyes. You walked back to your seat and continued to wait, hoping that the surgery wouldn’t take much longer and that it would be a good outcome. The vet hadn’t thought it was anything life threatening but you worried regardless of that fact. He hadn’t witnessed the accident, or heard the cries of fear and pain coming from the poor animals mouth.

 

 

An hour had passed when a young man burst through the doors, his eyes frantic as he looked around the room and rushed up to the desk. “I got a call to tell me that my dog was in an accident?! Is he ok? Where is he?” The vet nurse lead him over to where you were sitting and waited for him to take a seat.

 

 

“Yixing is it?” He nodded. “Your dog was hit by a car earlier today.” You saw him freeze and all of the colour disappear from his face. “This young woman next to you witnessed the accident, and when the driver didn’t stop, she brought your dog here. His injuries aren’t life threatening but we still had to put him under for surgery. That is where he is now. I’ll let you know of any updates as soon as I have them.” She smiled softly at both of you in the way that all nurses do before turning and heading back to the front desk.

 

 

The young man next to you had slumped forward with his head in his hands. This whole situation must be overwhelming for him. You remembered all too well how it had hit you the last time you had to experience the fear of loss. “What’s his name?” You asked gently.

 

 

He rubbed his face with his hands as he sat back up and looked at you, pain and fear in his eyes. “Guiying.” He coughed. “His name is Guiying.”

 

 

You tried a small smile. “He’s very much like his namesake.” Yixing half chuckled. “He was frightened but he was very brave, letting a complete stranger pick him up and drive him off to who knows where.”

 

 

“He might be brave but he’s also foolish.” He sighed. “He must have escaped the backyard and run off, and just… just got distracted by traffic.” He sniffed as he took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.

 

 

You placed a hand on his shoulder as you tried to reassure him. “Hey, I’m pretty sure it was just his hind leg that was broken, but that they had to put pins in, hence the surgery. He’ll be ok.”

 

 

Yixing grabbed your hand and held it tightly in his. “Thank you for caring enough to help him.”

 

 

“I just did what anyone would.” you said.

 

 

“No,” he shook his head. “You didn’t. Most people would not stop in the middle of an intersection to help an animal. Most people would just keep driving, thinking someone else would help it or that it was too late to help. You,” He choked back a sob. “You saved his life.”

 

 

You couldn’t speak because you could feel your emotions in your throat, tears were so close to forming and you did not want to let them. Instead you smiled and squeezed his hand. The two of you sat in silence, his hand still not leaving yours, as though your hand was his anchor to reality and hope.

 

 

After another hour of sitting and occasionally chatting about life, avoiding the topic of the accident, instead trying to distract yourselves from the fact that you were both sitting in the animal hospital waiting room late at night, you’d come to the realisation that if the circumstances were different, Yixing was someone you would be interested in. He was kind, honest, thoughtful, funny and it was futile to deny that he was incredibly easy on the eyes. But in the back of your mind you had to remind yourself not to flirt with him, the poor man was waiting to see if his beloved dog was ok, this was not the time nor the place. Normally you despised small talk, but you’d made an exception for Yixing since you were trying to keep both him and yourself distracted from thinking about Guiying.

 

 

“I know I’ve said it repeatedly tonight, but thank you.” He said.

 

 

You smiled. “And like I’ve said every time, I was more than willing to do what I did.”

 

 

Yixing shook his head. “No, I mean yes, thank you for that but this thank you was specifically for staying here with me and waiting. You didn’t have to do that. And don’t think I haven’t realised that you’ve been trying to keep me distracted.” He half smiled at you.

 

 

“Ah, you caught me.” You chuckled.

 

 

“You’re good at it.” He paused as his eyes drifted from your eyes to your mouth, a fleeting glance, before moving back up to your eyes again. “I’ve worried less in the past hour than I thought I would and that’s thanks to you.”

 

 

Your reply is interrupted when the vet emerges from a door and walks over to the two of you. “Yixing?” He asks as he looks down at the young man next to you who is fidgeting as all of his worries flood back into his system.

 

 

Without thinking you grab his hand to ground him. He grips back tightly as he responds. “Y-yes. Is?…how?…please,” he stutters out.

 

 

The vet crouches down to bring himself to eye level with Yixing. “Hey, calm yourself. Thanks to the lovely young woman next to you your dog is going to be just fine. He has a broken leg that will take time to heal and he had an internal obstruction caused by the accident. I’ve fixed him up and he’ll be able to come home with you in a few days. We have to keep him here for a few nights for observation. He’s a little groggy post-op but you can come and see him if you’d like.”

 

 

Yixing exhales a breath you hadn’t realised he was holding. He thanks the vet profusely before standing and turning to see if you were coming as well. You let go of his hand and shook your head lightly. “I think, if it’s ok with you, that I’ll visit Guiying tomorrow. I’m just glad he’s ok.”

 

 

“Are you sure? I don’t mind if you come along now.” He started but you stopped him.

 

 

“Yixing, it’s sweet of you, really, but I think it’ll be better for you to go see him alone.” You looked over at the vet. “Is it ok if I drop by around 11am tomorrow to visit?” He nodded and told you that as long as Yixing was ok with it then they’d allow it. Yixing was more than happy to oblige you visiting his dog since you were the reason he was even still alive.

 

 

You watched as Yixing’s form disappeared behind the door and turned to the vet nurse who was holding a clipboard out to you. “What’s this?” You asked, confused.

 

 

“We have a policy that is to wait until after surgery to hand these kinds of forms out. You mentioned a car hit the animal right?” She asked.

 

 

“Yes.”

 

 

“This form is for you to write down all of the details of the accident that you can recall so that we can send it on to the police. Not common policy, I know, but there is an officer there who follows up the reports we send him.” She hands you the clipboard. “If you just fill them out before you leave, I’d be really grateful.”

 

 

You take the clipboard and take a seat, filling out all of the details you can remember. You aren’t sure how this helps, was hitting an animal even illegal? You hated the driver for not stopping but there was no denying that it _was_ an accident. You hummed as you finished filling out the forms, then got up and handed it back to the vet nurse. She thanked you as you turned to take your leave.

 

 

“Wait!” 

 

 

You had reached the door to your car when you heard his voice as he ran out the front door to catch you. He slowed to a jog as he got closer to you, then a purposeful walk. “Yixing? Is something wrong?” You noticed the glistening in is eyes, a clear indicator of tears. Shit. Had something happened? Was Guiying ok? 

 

 

He didn’t respond, he simply walked straight up to you and enveloped you in an embrace. He held you tightly for what felt like minutes, and you weren’t sure if you should be happy or sad. You had no indication for what this hug was for. When he pulled back you couldn’t wait any longer to get answers. “What happened? Why have you got tears in your eyes? Is he ok? Fuck, he was ok 10 minutes ago, what could have happe-” 

 

 

You were cut off by Yixing’s finger touching your lips, shushing you. You looked from his hand on your lips up to his face, his expression unreadable. He leant in, pausing at the exact moment before his lips touched yours. Somehow you still had the brains to speak. “What are you-”

 

 

“Shut up and kiss me already.”


	19. Better Off Dead

**Prompt: Namjoon + “Hold on, you died” “Yeah, well it didn’t stick.” + “I promise I won’t bite. Unless you ask.”**

**Setting/AU: Vampire AU**

**Warnings: Character death, swearing, implied sex, vampires**

**Word Count: 1949**

“Happy Halloween kids!” You aunt called out as both you and Namjoon descended the stairs from your apartment.

 

 

You groaned in unison. “Oh my god, please don’t!” You cried out. Beside you Namjoon choked on his laughter. You smacked your friend for his betrayal.

 

 

“Ow! The hell was that for?” He winced as he dramatically clung to his right arm.

 

 

You huffed. “You’re not supposed to laugh when she embarrasses me like that. I’m a grown adult, not a kid. Besides, it’s Samhain. Halloween is so… commercial and tacky. It’s a special day, not a day for dressing like a twat and handing out candy.”

 

 

Namjoon shakes his head as the two of you continue walking towards campus. “Do you really believe all of the lore surrounding it?”

 

 

This was one of the reasons the two of you had been friends for so long. He’d let you rant and rave on your soapbox until you were blue in the face. He’d listen to everything you had to say and when you were done, he’d challenge your logic with questions. It was so nice to debate with someone who didn’t just shut you down. “I mean, traditionally the day is to celebrate the end of the harvest & the Celts held rituals to thank their gods for their harvest & to protect them during the winter that was to come. They honoured the dead as it was considered a liminal time, and that’s where the folklore takes artistic liberty. Really it was just that Samhain was halfway between solstices and they considered the veil between this world and the afterlife to be thin, that spirits were free to roam the earth for one night. It was a peaceful celebration but somewhere along the lines it was twisted into satan worship and tales of terror - demons and ghosts and all of that. Don’t even get me started on the vampire stuff.”

 

 

He nodded as you spoke, taking in all of the facts you were providing. “I know all of that. The bonfires, the dancing, the fae folklore about being lured by faeries to their circles and never being able to leave. I asked if you believed all of it and if I’m not mistaken, you did not answer me.” His tone was always matter of fact but when he spoke with you, there was always a hint of teasing involved too, just to rile you up.

 

 

“I don’t believe in the ghost stories, the demons and faerie lore that associates itself with Samhain. I do believe the rituals for honouring the dead and thanking the gods for the harvest. I believe it’s a time for reflection and for celebration before the cold months come.” You replied. “I also believe that that answered your question did it not?” You teased.

 

 

He chuckled as the two of you reached the campus. “You did, but there is no reason to be smug about it.” He poked your nose. “I’ve got like 4 hours of class coming up so I won’t see you until tonight. That is if you decide to grace our Halloween party.” He grinned.

 

 

“How quickly do you think Yoongi will throw me out if I educate the partygoers about Samhain?” You joke.

 

 

“Try it and find out. I want to see THAT particular conversation go down.” He grinned. “I think he only just decided to start speaking to you again after you tried to take over his St Patrick’s Day party.” You opened your mouth but Namjoon held out his hand to stop you. “For the love of all that is good, don’t start this again. I’ve gotta run, come by tonight?”

 

 

“I’ll think about it.” Is the best answer you can give. It’s good enough for Namjoon because he smiles and turns to run off to class. You still have twenty minutes before your next class so you decide to grab a coffee, a decision that you instantly regret when you set foot in the cafe. “Fucking pumpkin spiced lattes and fucking lame costumes. Gods I hate Halloween.” You mutter to yourself.

 

 

Beside you you hear a low chuckle. You glance over to find Yoongi standing next to you. His glare freezing you to the spot. “Please, do not go off on one of your manic rants. I haven’t had my coffee yet and I will kill you if you screech like a banshee as those vapid sorority girls.”

 

 

“You hate them too, why not let me have my fun?” You ground out.

 

 

“Do whatever you want after I’ve left with my life source. Do it before then and Namjoon will have to bail me out of jail for making an attempt on your life.” He bites back.

 

 

“That’s an awful way to treat your fuck buddy.” You smirk. Your words don’t phase Yoongi and honestly you shouldn’t expect them to. You know how he is before that first cup of the day and it’s not pretty.

 

 

***

 

 

You never ended up going to the party, something you regret every day. You never knew that the last time you’d see Namjoon was as he ran off to class that day. You went straight home after your classes and collapsed into your bed, ordered pizza and binged a season of White Collar. You missed the frantic calls from Yoongi, the stream of messages from mutual friends as they tried to check in on you. Little did you know that the worst had happened.

 

 

They don’t prepare you for how to feel when you find out that your best friend dies. You expect that kind of thing to happen when you’re both 80 and at peace with the concept. You don’t expect it to happen when you’re in your early twenties, the prime of your life. But it did. Namjoon was ripped from the earth by a drug addict in a mugging gone wrong on his way to Yoongi’s party. The police told you he died quickly from the stab wounds but that did little to make you feel better. All you could think of was that he was alone as he bled out on the shortcut he always took to Yoongi’s place. It was irrational to think that if you were with him that this wouldn’t have happened but you still felt guilty for not being there, for not being able to comfort him.

 

 

You went through the textbook stages of grief, Yoongi going through them as well. The two of you had to cease your arrangement, agreeing that time apart to accept the loss of your friend and to heal in a healthy way was necessary. After a month the two of you started to catch up for coffee and lunch, just to chat and to get both of you outside.

 

 

Everything reminded you of him, certain places, songs, topics, foods. Hell, even the rain reminded you of him. You could have sworn that you’d spotted him in the distance a few times, only to feel that sinking in your gut as you reminded yourself that it couldn’t be him. Nights were worse because you could still hear his voice.

 

 

***

 

 

“Don’t scream. Just hear me out.” He said calmly.

 

 

You were anything but calm. Until twenty seconds ago you were peacefully sleeping. Then he shook you awake. You had to be dreaming because he couldn’t be here, he could never be here again. Your eyes widened in shock, you brain telling you to scream. Maybe you were seeing him when it was in fact a murderer in your room. You were too scared to even ask yourself why a murdered would wake you up so gently before you know, murdering you. He let go of you and slowly stepped away from the bed. With every step he took you felt a little more at ease.

 

 

“I’m just going to sit at your desk. When you’re ready to talk, let me know.” He said, as though this was a normal visit.

 

 

“Why are you here?” You started.

 

 

“I… well I missed you.” He said slowly.

 

 

“How are you here?” You asked.

 

 

“I still have a key to the apartment.” He replied nonchalantly.

 

 

You shook your head as you tried to sift through your thoughts.  “Hold on, you died.”

 

 

He shrugged. “Yeah, well it didn’t stick.”

 

 

He was too calm for this. You were freaking out because your best friend, who you missed like crazy, was sitting in your room in the middle of the night because he missed you. This would be less terrifying if he hadn’t died two months ago. You felt your heart hammering in your chest as you tried to process this conversation. “Namjoon. Don’t take this the wrong way but I’m gonna need an explanation here because you fucking died and you cannot be here right now. I’m either asleep and having the weirdest dream ever or I fucking lost it and had a mental breakdown.”

 

 

“You’re not crazy, but you’re going to hate what I’m about to tell you.” He smiled tightly. It looked like his smile but the feeling was off.

 

 

“You know what. Try me, because right now I’m processing that I’m talking to a dead guy so honestly, how much worse can it get?” You were pretty sure you were crazy but no one else was present, except for Namjoon and he didn’t count, to tell you otherwise. You made a mental note to self admit yourself as soon as this conversation was over or at sunrise, whichever came first.

 

 

He scratched his jaw as he avoided your gaze. Something he used to do all the time when he had to give you information that he knew would be poorly received. “The police report isn’t wrong, it just left out some vital information. I was on my way to Yoongi’s party when a junkie jumped me and stabbed me. I did bleed out in the alley, scared and helpless, but it was quick and my suffering was short. I said my goodbyes in my mind and asked the universe to look after you because I knew you’d blame yourself.” He paused and made eye contact with you. “There was nothing you could have done, trust me.” You felt a tear slide down your cheek as you heard the story of how your best friend died all over again. “What they left out was the bite marks on my neck that the junkie inflicted before trying to cover them up with the stab wounds. The also left out the part where my body mysteriously went missing after they locked the morgue.” He sighed deeply. “I woke up three hours from here in a cabin. I was confused and terrified but glad to be alive. I had no idea how I’d survived but the pain in my guy made me think I was still injured. I later learned that the pain was in fact, hunger. And that I hadn’t survived. Not entirely.”

 

 

Something clicked in your brain at that moment. “Fuck. Off.”

 

 

He chuckled. “Please, the cruel irony isn’t lost on me either.”

 

 

“Are. Are you trying to tell me, ME?! That you, Kim Namjoon, are a goddamn vampire?!” You spat out in a mixture of disgust and disbelief.

 

 

“I promise I won’t bite. Unless you ask.” He shrugged.

 

 

“I think I preferred it when I thought you were dead. Honestly, of all the things to be real, fucking vampires?! I don’t think we can be friends anymore.”

 

 

“I missed you too.” He strode over and enveloped you in a hug.


	20. Mutiny

**Prompt: Kai/Suho + “Why did I agree to marry you again?” + “What? Does that feel good?”**

**Setting/AU: Pirate**

**Warnings: mentions of sex, no real warning though**

**Word Count: 1100**

The boat rocked violently as the storm took hold. “Why are we risking our lives again?” One of the shipmates yelled as he tied down ropes for the sixth time since you left the safety of the Nassau dock. You couldn’t see who it was through the sea spray and rain that was battering the deck, not that it mattered. Conditions were abysmal but the crew were doing their best to keep the damn ship in one piece, mostly so that they could live to see another day. Jumping ship right now would mean certain death. So as much as they wanted to descend upon the captains cabin and slit his throat, their desire to remain among the living outweighed the desire for blood…at the moment. 

 

  
“Because our incredibly competent, rational and definitely not pants on head crazy captain decided that there was buried treasure in Dead Man’s Bay, and we _had_ to set a course immediately. If this storm doesn’t kill him, I will.” You yelled back, loud enough to be heard over the crashing waves.

 

 

Your captain was notorious for setting sail on a whim, always seeking out treasure that other crews were too scared to seek out. Usually with good reason - like cursed treasure, dangerous waters, and other various life threatening variables. He didn’t see the point in easy gains, there was no thrill in it for him unless someone almost died, much to the chagrin of the crew. He was an excellent captain most of the time, always making sure the crew got their share of any spoils, never leaving anyone behind (even though there had been a few occasions where leaving certain crew members to rot on an island would have been for the best) but it was remarkably easy to forget that he was a decent pirate when he had you sailing through a storm that was sure to do its best to kill you.

 

  
“Why did I agree to marry you again?” A voice sounded behind you, much closer than expected. You turned your head to find said captain behind you with a hurt expression on his face. Why did he have to look like a kicked puppy when he pouted? A grown ass pirate captain shouldn’t pout. He should sneer and have some kind of witty comeback to whatever anyone said. Trust you to end up married to a pirate who was in touch with his emotions. Yes, _this_ pirate was your husband. You weren’t unhappy with this decision, most of the time, but in situations like the one you were currently in, rigging the sails like your life depended on it - because it very much _did_ \- you would be lying if you didn’t reflect on the reasons for marrying him.

 

 

“Kai either get back in the cabin or help the crew keep this ship above sea level.” You yelled. “Why the _fuck_ are we going through the middle of this storm? Do you want us all to die?!” Your eyes were wild as you turned to face him. If the two of you lived through this night you were going to be having a very frank discussion about human rights and safety protocol, something he vagued out on too often for your liking. Pirates only ever thought of the gold, never the danger along the way. The only reason Kai was still alive was because he had you. You’d lost count of the amount of times you’d saved his and his crew’s skin.  
  


 

  
“I honestly didn’t think it would be this bad.” He replied with a shrug. You wanted to slap him. “It is refreshing though isn’t it? Having to really work to get to our destination, where is the fun in a smooth ride?” He grinned. Now you really wanted to slap him.

 

  
  
The ocean answered before you could. Two waves crashing into the ship from different directions, throwing Kai off balance and nearly overboard. You should only be so lucky. Of course he corrected his footing at the last second and clung to a rope which resulted in him swinging out in an arc and landing on the stairs, grinning like he meant to do that. You glared at him, stabbing him in your mind. He moved swiftly after seeing your face, rushing up to take over the wheel, barking orders at the crew.

 

 

Minutes blurred into hours, the dark skies and thunderous sea unforgiving as it kept up its mission to destroy your vessel. Kai was not deterred, he pushed the crew to their breaking point as he steered them through the storm. You must have been about two thirds of the way through it when he took over, he’d take all of the credit though because of course he would - pirate, duh. Soon enough you saw the skies start to clear and the waves started to lessen their assault. Everyone onboard sighed in relief and exhaustion. It was a near miracle that all of you were still alive, not that you’d admit that. There was no need to stroke his ego at a time like this.

 

  
Once you were certain that you’d cleared the storm you retreated from the rigging and had a shipmate take the wheel so that you could talk to Kai in his cabin. He looked triumphant and all too pleased with himself. As though it was he alone who had kept everyone alive. Like he had moved heaven and earth to guide them to safety. It made you want to slap the look off his face.  
  


 

“What? Does that feel good?” You asked sarcastically.

 

 

“What?” He replied, confused at your tone. For a smarter than average pirate, he sure was dense. You wondered if he’d been smacked over the head a few too many times. You’d believe it given how many times you thought about slapping him today.  
  


 

“You look like you expect a medal for navigating the storm that you put us in. Like it was you, and you alone who kept the crew alive. Does it feel good to have _that large_ of a god complex?”  
  


 

  
“I’m not going to turn down a medal, it would make me look distinguished don’t you think?” You scoffed. “I’d settle for a blowjob.” He grinned.

  
  


“Then I hope you’re feeling flexible. I hear its difficult to self fellate, but I’m sure you’ll work it out.” You patted him on the shoulder and headed back out to check on your crew.


	21. Nimble Wrath

**Prompt: Kihyun + “I don’t want to be lady-like. I want to lure men to their death.” + “Just pretend to be my date.”**

**Setting/AU: Assassin**

**Warnings: none - it’s not a great drabble but I tried. I hope you enjoy it. Oh, crossdressing I guess, and mentions of violence.  
**

**Word Count: 1692**

“I swear to god Kihyun if you don’t keep your legs closed I will turn you into a _eunuch_.” You said through clenched teeth, trying not to draw attention to yourself.  The last thing both of you needed was to be made before the mission even began. “You are supposed to be a lady, _fucking act like one_.” You hissed as you waited for your drink to be mixed.

 

 

“I still don’t understand why I had to be the lady when _you_ have all of the correct parts.” He grumbled as he crossed his legs. He wasn’t wrong, anatomically speaking you were a better fit for the flirtatious damsel role but you were better suited to hiding in the shadows and moving through crowds unnoticed until you found your opening and struck. No one knew what you looked like but everyone feared you. Children told tales to scare their siblings about how the faceless assassin, _The Nimble Wrath_ , would kill them in their sleep. First off, you didn’t kill kids. Well not unless they were truly beyond redemption and even so, that had only been once. The world was a dark and twisted place, you were more than aware of that but _nothing_ had prepared you for the horrors that the child King had brought about.

 

“I don’t want to be lady-like. I want to lure men to their death.” you replied which only served to piss Kihyun off some more. Ki had lucked out this very eve and had to play the part of a young woman looking for love. He fit the part almost too well. After the illusion had been perfected he had stood before you and Shownu in billowing skirts that showed just the right amount of leg (Kihyun was not impressed when he worked out that his leg hair had to be removed), a corset and bolero. The wig was a near perfect fit and his long brown curls framed his elfin face wonderfully. A touch of makeup here, a choker (to hide the adams apple) and a few lessons in being a lady there had completed the process. And now? Now you were both at the bar. You were dressed in such a way that no one would spare you a second glance, which was the whole point. You had to drop Kihyun off, wait for the bartenders to switch so that Shownu could take his place and then you were to make your exit and find a place to observe and wait until it was time to strike.

 

You covered your mouth and coughed, covering the scoff that almost escaped at his words. “Ladies, we’ll have all the time in the world for you both to have a catfight after we complete our mission. You glanced up ever so slightly as Shownu placed your drink in front of you. He placed a colourful mixture in front of Kihyun and smirked. “From the gentleman at the end of the bar, he’s not our target but he will be watching your every move sweetheart.” He didn’t take his eyes off Kihyun as he spoke to you. “Final report said that he’d be here within the hour, flanked by at least four of his cronies. He always has a sniper with him so best check the roof first and take care of that otherwise this whole thing will go to shit.” You placed your coins on the bar, finished your drink and took your leave. Now the real fun began.

 

You’d hidden yourself in a dark corner of the roof so that you’d be able to spot the sniper if they climbed up here. In the middle of the roof there was a flat glass ceiling that provided a perfect view of the bar. You figured it was a prime spot for the sniper to keep an eye on their charge. Another difference between yourself & Kihyun? Kihyun would kill the sniper as soon as they appeared while you were content to watch them as they plotted out the route they’d follow when their charge left the bar. Even then you didn’t kill them, no you shot a sleep dark at them which found its mark in their neck. Once you were certain that they were out cold you stripped their most damaging weapons from them and tied them to one of the iron posts, making sure it was far enough from the glass ceiling that they had no way to see what was going on in the bar or the streets below.

 

After that you waited for Kihyun to work his magic and charm your target out of his mind. 

 

It took longer than expected all thanks to the gentleman at the end of the bar. He had decided that just because the pretty lady he’d taken an interest in was flirting with another man, a dangerous looking man with bodyguards, that he still had a chance to win her over. You rubbed a hand over your face. This was exactly what you didn’t need. You were more than capable of taking the target out from here but the mission was to do it without any witnesses. The sleep dart would buy you another 20 minutes tops then the mission would go awry.

 

You hastily made your way across three rooftops and into the back of the nearby brothel that affiliated itself with the assassins guild, quietly of course, and searched for Minhyuk. You found him in a room with a couple of working girls just as things were beginning to heat up. “Don’t look at me like that. I know we weren’t supposed to involve you but we have a lingerer who is preventing Ki from reeling in the target.”

 

Minhyuk sighed and stopped undressing. “I warned you that he’d turn heads.” He headed over to a closet and started to rummage through its contents. “Let me guess, you need Dior to otherwise distract this aforementioned lingerer?”

 

“Please.”

 

“Give me five minutes.” He turned to the two working girls. “New plan. Jade you’re on make-up and Sunmi, you’re on hair.” When he turned back to you he grinned. “While you were studying the blade, I was studying the pleasures of the flesh.”

 

Not wanting to waste time you told him which bar to head towards and described the gentleman he was to distract then made haste back to your rooftop. The sniper should still be out cold but you were reluctant to have him out of your sights any longer than required.

 

The mission was simple: seduce the target so that he leaves the protection of his guards and goes off with Kihyun to a secluded building. Ki keeps up the charade as long as possible so that you can appear from the shadows and eliminate the target. Put the body in the wagon so that Shownu can dispose of it. Then you help him change out of his damsel getup and the two of you wander back out into the streets, a happy couple out for a stroll.  

 

The gentleman at the other end of the bar was seriously screwing with the plan. If he spooked Ki or the target then the whole mission could potentially be blown and you had no intention of not completing it. The guild had a 100% success rate and you were not about to change that.

 

Thankfully Minhyuk was fucking good at his job. The guy was no assassin but he was a world class seducer. If you were infamously known as the Nimble Wrath then he was equally known as the Sapphire Cat. The name was fitting what with his piercing blue eyes, wicked smile and his ability to play cat and mouse so well that the mouse never even knew it was in a trap. It did not matter who he set his sights on, they always fell for him. In fact, you and half of the guild had bets on how long it would take for him to have someone wrapped around his finger.  You once asked him what he whispered in his target’s ears before their defenses visibly crumbled around them but he refused to tell you. “Oh honey, I have to keep some trade secrets. After all, you don’t tell me everything about your secret tricks now do you?”

 

The gentleman who had taken interest in Kihyun didn’t know what had hit him when Minhyuk set his sights on him. He was dolled up as his alter ego Dior and unbeknownst to the gentleman what Dior wanted, Dior got. The only reason Shownu hadn’t asked him to perform the role that Kihyun currently was was due to the fact that Kihyun’s close combat skills were second to none. If everything went pear shaped Shownu could count of Kihyun to not only eliminate the target but also the bodyguards.

 

***

 

“That was touch and go for a little while.” Kihyun sighed as he unlaced his corset, relief flooding his features when the constricting garment was separated from his body. “Did we really need to bring in Minhyuk though? His services don’t come cheap.”

 

You chuckled as you tossed the discarded ladies garments into the carriage. “He agreed to give us a freebie as long as we made sure to feed the grapevine. The sapphire cat and the nimble wrath in the same town at the same time? _Scandalous_!” 

 

When you finished putting everything in the carriage you sealed it up so that all Shownu had to do was jump in and go when you caused a distraction a few blocks away. You made the final adjustments to your outfit and waited for Ki to finish buttoning his shirt. He rolled his eyes when he saw the adjustments you’d made to your coat. “Now who looks like a lady?”

 

“Ah, but I don’t want to be lady-like. I want to lure men to their death.” You grinned, pulling a dagger out from one of the many holsters you had hidden under your flowing coat.

 

“Oh shut up.” He groaned, extending his arm so that he could entwine yours with his. “Just pretend to be my date.”


	22. Definitely Not Hogwarts

**Prompt: Baekhyun + “You taste like fucking candy.” + “I was just hoping that y’know… you’d fall in love with me.”**

**Setting/AU: Magic**

**Warnings: innuendo, magic, completely non subtle references, swearing.**

**Word Count: 7173 (it’s still a drabble, let’s pretend it isn’t this long)  
**

**A/N: I hope you enjoy it, you kind of get everyone in this as an added bonus for me taking so long.**

If there was something you hated more than changing schools mid-year you had yet to encounter it. Why had you agreed? Because it was a great opportunity. So great that you’d accepted the offer knowing full well that you’d be moving in the middle of the year, packing all of your belongings into boxes - ones to take with you and ones to go into storage, and starting in classes that had already set their dynamic up for the year. Would it be easy? Not at all. Did you still want to do it? You bet your ass you did.

 

 

The school was in the middle of nowhere so you had to live on the premises. You’d never been to boarding school before so this concept was somewhat daunting but you were choosing to think of it as a hotel for the moment. All of the students lived in dorms and boarded for the year, only going home at the end of each term, and the teachers lived in separate wings of the school. Yes, wings, because the school was a goddamn castle.

 

 

 

Until a couple of years ago, they had never taken on a teacher’s aide before, but the powers that be had made a treaty between the gifted and the non gifted (god forbid the humans actually use the word magic, apparently that made it seem childlike and not the _absolute danger to society_ that the government liked to portray it as. Magic was neither childlike or the demise of society as we know it but you digress). In the two years following that they had taken on a handful of aides, always non gifted, and usually morally opposed to the concept of magic, a choice that made you think that the wizard in control of the school was in fact, enjoying this whole ‘play nice with the humans’ thing far too much. The aide who had been chosen this year had vacated his position without notice at the end of the second term due to a spell gone wrong. Or something. The particulars were unclear. All you knew was that on one late summer morning you received an offer and should you have accepted that offer (you did, but you made sure not to sound too desperate when accepting it) you would have three days to prepare and move.

 

 

 

Those three days had been a complete and utter whirlwind. Your friends were ecstatic for you. You were the first aide they had selected that had actually had a positive attitude to the concept of magic. First and foremost you believed in science, but you were open to the idea of there being something _more_ out there and if it could be applied to positively benefit human society then you were all for it. Plus, who _wasn’t_ curious about what these kids were being taught?

 

 

 

Your work was sad to see you leave but thankfully you were only employed casually so you didn’t have to adhere to the standard procedure of giving two weeks notice or break any contracts in order to accept your new role, one of the bonuses to being a university student who was unable to work full time. You’d never been happier to not have job security.

 

 

 

Upon arrival to the ~~castle~~ school you were ushered to your wing (the north one with the big spire) by an overly enthusiastic pair of seniors, one of which kept cracking terrible jokes that you guessed were meant to put you at ease but they were just making you cringe, something that the taller senior - you were pretty sure he said his name was Chanyeol - found hilarious. The two showed you to your room, if you could call it that. 

 

 

 

You felt like you’d been transported to the world of one of the many books you read while you were growing up - the princess or assassin (your parents made sure you didn’t reach adulthood believing that some man was going to come whisk you off your feet and solve all of life’s problems for you. They gave you books where the women took charge and fucked shit up as well as the damsels in distress, and ones with useless protagonists and ones with good men) living in the tower of a castle, waiting for the unfairly attractive prince or guard to appear so that hijinks could ensue. Your “room” was more of a suite, if castles could have suites. You decided they could, because you couldn’t fathom calling this a room, it was a bit too grandiose for that. You had a bedroom, private study/office, bathroom and tutoring room.

 

 

 

“As you can see, you have space for smaller lessons or tutoring.” Suho explained as you entered the small space, only a few desks and chairs decorating the room. “It’s mostly seniors who will come to you to go over homework, assignments, and anything they’re stuck on.” He added.

 

 

 

“But I’m just here as an aide, not as a teacher. Why would they come to me?” You asked.

 

 

 

Chanyeol replied. “A few reasons. First, if they don’t want the teacher to know that they haven’t fully grasped what was covered in the lesson, the school is super competitive so no one ever wants to let another student see an area that they are weak in. Second, you’ll be marking homework and assignments so they’d come to you if they want clarification around grades. Third, some will come to you to try and scare you. It’s like a sport for some of the students. They see how long the new non-gifted will last before running for the hills.” Your face must have dropped because he instantly waved his hands as he tried to lessen the blow of his statement. “N-not that all students are like that, there’s just a select group who do it. Most of us welcome the initiative to have humans in our school so that they can see that we’re not the evil witches and wizards of their childhood stories.”

 

 

 

“The castle and long robes aren’t helping that, just saying.” You deadpan.

 

 

 

Suho makes a sound akin to choking on air but when you look at him you see that he’s laughing. He looks at Chanyeol as he tries to calm himself but he keeps laughing while trying to speak. “I like her. I don’t think she has anything to worry about with that attitude.” The look the other senior gives him is one of pure exasperation and you have to do all that you can not to crack up at his face. 

 

 

 

“Hyung…” he starts but then thinks better of it. His long legs carry him through to the next room, he clears his throat before continuing to speak. You leave Suho, who is still chuckling to himself, in the tutoring room. “This room is your office. It’s kind of a half library, half office. You can do your own research in here and organise all of your work in the room. If you ever need the fire lit just ask me to come and do it. I’m proficient with fire, most students can conjure fire but some would mess with you and light a fire that emits a stench, or one that burns too hot, one that talks to you, you get the idea.” 

 

 

 

You nod and make a mental note to ask him to light the fire in winter for you if you haven’t come across any other trustworthy students by then. The proficiency stuff is new information to you. You knew that the gifted could conjure elemental magic but you didn’t know that they had proficiencies for certain elements. 

  
  


  
“I apologise for Chanyeol, he always forgets that the non-gifted don’t know about the proficiencies. I’m assuming that’s why you look confused?” Suho leans against the door frame as he speaks. He pushes off and enters the room once you nod. “To cut a long and dreary history short, _gifted_ \- as you refer to us - have the ability to wield elemental magic. Certain families have a proficiency with certain elements which allows them to have superior control over that element. In Chanyeol’s case that is fire. In mine, water. There are nine such students at this school but if we go by our history books there are twelve families with proficiencies. We can do greater things with our elements and we take extra classes to hone our skills with them. Normal students can cast a spell to light a fire in here for you but Chanyeol could click his fingers and a fire would light, or he could create a flame in his hand and have it hover for you.” 

 

 

 

“Can he hadouken too?” The words leave your mouth before you can stop them. Chanyeol folds in half, slapping his leg as he laughs. Suho looks less amused. “Or do you guys have special rings? Can your powers combined conjure Captain Planet?” Chanyeol is struggling to breathe because of how hard he’s laughing.

 

 

 

“That’s… that’s not how the elemental magic works.” He begins.

 

 

 

“Suho, I’m kidding.” You interrupt. “You need to brush up on your human pop culture circa the 1990’s.” You smirk. “Just doing my part to help eliminate the dark, evil wizard stereotype all of you have going for you.”

 

 

 

He chuckles at that, shaking his head as he moves towards the next room, lightly shoving Chanyeol as he passes. “This next room is your bedroom. You’ve got one of the better rooms. You should see the aide’s room in the East Wing, it’s like a shoebox. (You thank all that is good for giving you something better than a cupboard under the stairs.) It has your bed, wardrobe, lounge and adjoining bathroom. It’s the only aide room that has that actually, all of the other wings have a communal bathroom for the aides but you lucked out with a private bath.”

 

 

 

You wanted to make a witty remark about that but all words died on your tongue as you stepped into the room. This was far too grand to be called a bedroom. You had a giant four poster bed to one side, a lounge suite by the fireplace, a couple of wardrobes and shelves, a table with four chairs and a little kitchenette. This was more like a studio apartment but in a castle. Everything was ornate, it was like medieval meets industrial aesthetically, which worked far better than you imagined it would.

 

 

 

“It’s pretty nice isn’t it?” Chanyeol remarked. “Like we said, you got pretty much the best aide room out of the lot.” He scratched the back of his head as he pondered what to say next. “Uh, that pretty much concludes the tour of your room. We’ve both got class to get to but Xiumin & D.O. will come by to take you on the tour of the grounds. They’re two of the other students with proficiencies as well, and they’re both trustworthy so you’ll be in good hands.” The two students bowed and waved farewell to you, wishing you well on your first week at the school before they left.

 

 

 

The other two students turned up not long after Suho & Chanyeol left. One arrived while making voice notes into his dictaphone and the other while cleaning his glasses. It wasn’t difficult for you to guess that these two would be top students, they just gave off the ‘we study a lot and it shows in our results’ kind of aura. You had been informed that all of the senior students who would be showing you around were high achievers but where Chanyeol and Suho were a more relaxed and reserved levels of intellect, these two exuded it.

 

 

 

The two students bowed to you and introduced themselves. The one with glasses was D.O. and the one with the dictaphone was Xiumin. You swallowed the urge to make a Harry Potter joke to D.O. but with that style of glasses he was on borrowed time before you blurted it out. You were, after all, supposed to be professional. You might only be a few years older than these seniors but you were an employee of this establishment, not the new kid. You didn’t have to fit in or be classified as cool. You had the feeling that until you actually started working you’d have to keep reminding yourself of that fact.

 

 

 

“So we’ll be showing you the grounds so that you have a general layout of the school. If you get lost you can always ask a student but to be on the safe side I’d recommend a fellow teacher or a student whom you recognise. Others might find it fun to mislead the new non-gifted aide.” D.O. explained. Why were these seniors painting this school like it was filled with miscreants? Did the students not respect their elders or were humans looked down on that much? Were you just a temporary plaything to them or something?

 

 

 

“Do the students have issues with treating the non-gifted aides with any modicum of respect?” You asked.

 

 

 

“It’s not that. The majority of the student body welcome the integration of humans into our school, we have just as much to learn from you as you do from us if our kind are to coexist moving forward.” Xiumin replied. “But there are a select few, as there are in any setting, who will only find pleasure in making your life difficult. They will take any chance they get to embarrass and ridicule you, to trick you and to eventually send you running from this school. Their primitive thought process is that if they have enough aides flee the school that the whole initiative will be discontinued.” He shook his head as he finished speaking, showing you just how dumb he thought this select group of the student body were.

 

 

 

“What Xiumin is trying to say is trust your instincts. Don’t blindly trust a student because they act kind towards you, feel them out and work out if they are playing you. We’ve been through a few too many aides this year and that group think they can send anyone away. For the most part, don’t react to them. If they think their tricks have no effect on you hopefully they’ll just get bored and leave you alone.”

 

 

 

“Or, they will escalate their antics and put me in actual danger.” You rebuked.

 

 

 

“They’d get caught and punished if it came to that.” D.O. deadpanned then added. “I’m sure you’d be fine. While we’re out Lay, another senior, will be putting up warding magic on your room to prevent any hijinks from happening there.” _Hijinks?_ you mouthed but before you could say anything back to the half blood prince wannabe he started walking down the hall.

 

 

 

Xiumin chuckled under his breath and motioned for you to follow. “You’ll get used to him. He’s blunt but he’s not unkind. He doesn’t like his routine being messed with. Normally he’d be running a study group so he’s a little off kilter today. Just work with it please?” You nodded and followed the other male as he set off after not Harry Potter.

 

 

 

The tour was pretty informative, with both boys giving you some history for the different areas which you found fascinating. They also showed you the areas of the school you’d be frequenting the most - the main hall, the teachers lounge, kitchen, and a small selection of the classrooms you’d be in. They marked these locations on a map for you and went over the easiest routes for you to follow. Both of them were very polite and patient with you as you very slowly got your bearings. Xiumin advised for you to memorise the paths rather than any objects in the halls as they had a tendency to move. D.O. eventually led you to a large set of double doors and guided you down towards the grounds at the rear of the school. This place was massive and your brain hurt from trying to remember everything.

 

 

 

“The sports grounds, gym, amphitheater, horticulture and agriculture areas are spread out here. The easiest ways to know the borders of the grounds are the lake at the back, forest to the left and mountains to the right. You’re perfectly safe if you remain within those boundaries. We’ll quickly take you down to each building but you won’t have to come down here too often so don’t worry too much about memorising them.” He stated.

 

 

 

Xiumin added, with a grin on his face. “You’ll probably only come down to watch sporting matches. Even if you don’t really care for sport, adding magic makes the games much more interesting. Occasionally a class will be held down here if they are using spells that require a lot more space than a classroom offers.” You were going to have to witness this if only to put a real image in your mind of what that looked like. Until you did, it would be every tacky wizard movie you’d ever seen playing on repeat, which would drive you batty. The two of them continued showing you everything, adding fun facts and tidbits of history along the way.

 

 

 

“So, uh, forgive my ignorance but we really only have mainstream media to go off here. Do you guys use wands?” You ask.

 

 

 

D.O. scoffs indignantly. “We absolutely _do not_. Wands are for children and idiots.”

 

 

 

“What he means to say is that we use our hands and minds. Wands exist but are not widely used since they require far less skill and are less accurate.” Xiumin adds.

 

 

 

“Your mainstream media is dumb.” D.O. says.

 

 

 

You raise your hands. “Hey, no disagreement from me here. I know it’s incorrect with its portrayals 99% of the time which is why I asked.” Xiumin chuckles as he calms D.O. down. You hadn’t expected his outburst to be over a fucking wand but hey, weirder things were surely still to come.

 

 

 

Eventually the three of you approached the large doors that would lead you back within the main building. D.O. smiled when you looked to him to lead the way back. “Oh no. You’re going to lead us back to your room as best you can. Consider this a test of your short term memory.” He chuckled as your face fell.

 

 

 

“Fine.” You grumbled. How hard could it be to follow a map back to your room anyway?

 

 

 

Harder than it looked was apparently the answer. You made it back after a few wrong turns. Part of you wondered if this was some cruel joke where they got to laugh at you leading yourself in circles while futilely trying to reach your destination. The other part just wanted you to hurry up and work out how to get back to your room. When you spotted the stairs that led to your hallway you sighed in relief. Both boys smiled brightly at you. “We consider our tour a failure if you can’t find your way back. You might have made a few missteps but you got back without needing any assistance. You’ll know the grounds like the back of your hand soon enough.” Xiumin smiled.

 

 

 

The two of them led you the rest of the way back to your room before bidding you farewell. “We’ll see you in class.” Xiumin said as he bowed, a small smile on his face. He definitely didn’t look old enough to be a senior but who were you to judge? You were in a freaking school of magic, for all you knew he was 400 years old. Or maybe there was a portrait of him hidden in an attic somewhere. 

 

 

  
“Thanks for the tour, you both helped me out a lot. I will definitely be using this map over the coming days while I get my bearings. There is a lot of history here,” You gestured to your surroundings. “and it’s fascinating, I know you barely scratched the surface with the small insights you gave me but it was very informative and enjoyable.” You smiled.  
  


 

 

D.O. chuckled. “I’m glad you didn’t fine it too boring. Most of the aides that come through here don’t even listen to half of the tour we give.” He paused. “Actually, before we go I have a question for you.” His head tilted to the side as he appraised you, as if looking for some answer to his yet unasked question.  
  


 

 

“Go ahead, it’s the least I could do after such a lovely tour.” You replied.  
  


 

 

“Well, the least you could do would be nothing but -”  
  


 

 

“Let’s not debate semantics right now.” Xiumin interjected.  
  


 

 

D.O. huffed, but acquiesced. “Fine. We’ll ignore the idiosyncrasies of the english language for now.” Xiumin rolled his eyes, this was clearly not the first time he’d had to deal with the other nitpicking at insignificant details of the language. “My question is in two parts. Firstly, where do you stand on the issue of magic? and secondly, why did you accept this role?”  
  
  


 

Well that wasn’t the question you were expecting. You didn’t know what question you were expecting but it sure as hell wasn’t one this bold, especially not from a student. “To start with, you know I don’t actually have to answer you right? You are technically my students.” 

 

  
  


“Of course. Will you answer it though?” He asked, his gaze locked on yours. The balls on this kid…  
  


 

  
“I will, but the point is that I don’t owe you, or any student an explanation like this.” They both nod at you and wait for you to continue. “To answer the first part of your question, I believe in science. Always have and always will, but I’ve always had an interest in magic. It was this mystical thing that appeared in the storybooks of my childhood, and I don’t mean the propaganda that litters the homes of the non gifted, these books had the gifted as heroes, as people who saved the day. I watched the change happen. All it took was one world leader who realised the gifted were real and they feared the abilities you have over non gifted. Suddenly all of the children’s books had evil wizards and witches who would trick you and eat you. I was never swayed, my interest only grew once I realised that the mystical wonders from my childhood books were real. I think that in order for gifted and non gifted to coexist, they need to work together and not look at either side as less than or evil. There are terrible gifted and non gifted people but there are also wonderful gifted and non gifted people. We fear the unknown but if we work together, that fear lessens.” 

 

 

 

You pause to take a breath, noticing how wide Xiumin’s eyes have gotten as you’ve been speaking. “As for the second part, part of it has surely been answered in the first part of my response but aside from general curiosity and a belief in our kind working together I also want to be a part of that. It’s not lost on us that most non gifted selected for the program have been heavily against the concept of magic and view the gifted as the devil incarnate. I know I’m probably one of the first to be selected who has no negative preconceptions of what goes on here and I want to do my job, help students and be able to provide workable ideas for the future of our kind coexisting. I believe that if we can work together, science and magic combined will result in wondrous things.”  
  


 

 

Finally, he cracked a smile, his whole face changing into that of a bright young man. “You are a welcome change. You’re not wrong when you say that the other aides have a dislike of our kind and of magic as a whole. I think our kind chose the wrong approach by attempting to make a non gifted who was fundamentally against everything that we stand for change their mind by simply existing with us. It was never going to work, and even if it did your government could scratch it up to stockholm syndrome. Just.” His face hardens but his gaze softens as he looks at you. “Keep your wits about you and don’t be fooled by rose coloured glasses.”

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Your first few days went by without too many hiccups. You’d been thrown into a wide array of classes; apothecary, history of magic, potions, magical law, spellcasting & defense magic. The classes were overwhelming but oh so interesting, to the point that you had to keep reminding yourself that you were supposed to be reading up on the syllabus and grading homework against the guide sheets you’d been given, not giving your full attention to the teacher. That was easier said than done once the topic of dragons came up. It took all of your self restraint not to blurt out “Fucking hell, dragons are real?!” but maintaining your professional facade took priority. You made a note to read up on them later because they were even more fascinating than your childhood stories had hinted at.

 

 

 

You met most of the other proficient students thanks to Suho & Chanyeol introducing them to you. You’d run into Xiumin & D.O. again when they were on their way to their extra credit classes and asked them about their proficiencies, apologising for forgetting to ask the first time you’d met. They’d let you know that Xiumin’s proficiency was ice and D.O.’s was earth. You didn’t get to ask much more about it because they ran off to class, not wanting to be late and have that mark on their records.

 

 

 

“Good Afternoon Chanyeol, what can I do for you?” You’d asked when he approached you with two other students trailing behind him.

 

 

 

He grinned and gestured to the two behind him. “I figured I should introduce you to these two. They’ll either annoy the shit out of you or be model students.” You raised a brow at him. “They’re younger than most seniors, thanks to their proficiencies.” He stage whispered at you.

 

 

 

“You know we can hear you right?” One of them remarks.

 

 

 

To his credit, Chanyeol ignores them and continues talking. “Whilst they are young and immature, they possess a lot of control over their elements, Kai in particular.” He gestures to the boy to his left, who smiles shyly at you and waves. “They figured they should get him through school, disciplined & bursting at the seams with morals before he got too old. His proficiency is teleportation you see, so everyone does what they can to steer him away from a life of crime.”

 

 

 

You nod. “No ill gotten gains for you then.” Kai chuckles. “Can you only teleport yourself or can you take people and objects with you?”

 

 

 

“I can choose. I have to be touching whatever I want to take with me but if someone grabs me I can choose to teleport alone or with them.” He replies.

 

 

 

You lean forward on your desk. “How large an object can you move?” You ask.

 

 

 

He grins at you. “Not telling.”

 

 

 

You sigh dramatically. “Chanyeol, I fear that he might have already given in to a life of crime.” For a moment Chanyeol looks confused until the synapses connect and he realises that you’re poking fun. “If you do a dramatic pose when you teleport then I think you’re well on your way to the criminal mastermind title.”

 

 

 

Kai laughs loudly. “I like her.” he states before wandering off to find his seat. You just hoped the military never found out about him, they’d abuse his power wherever possible and he seemed far too kind for that kind of life.

 

 

 

The other male clears his throat to remind Chanyeol that he is still waiting for his introduction. Chanyeol’s eyes widen and then narrow in frustration. “This is the youngest of the proficient, Sehun. He likes to think that the universe revolves around him but we keep him grounded, figuratively and literally…once or twice.”

 

 

 

You glance past Chanyeol to Sehun. He looks like he has a chip on his shoulder, and the resting bitch face isn’t helping him not seem like a jerk to you but you give him the benefit of the doubt. “Hi Sehun, what is your proficiency?”

 

 

 

He gives you a very slight, like blink and you’d miss it kind of slight, smile as you feel a light breeze wash over you. “Wind.”

 

 

 

You ponder for a moment and bite your tongue to prevent another Captain Planet reference from coming out. “Wind would be the broad term though wouldn’t it? You control air right?” You ask.

 

 

 

He nods. “Yes. I can control and manipulate the air, it’s velocity and molecular structure.”

 

 

 

“Are they trying to prevent you from a life of crime as well by fast tracking your schooling?”

 

 

 

He smirks. “Something like that. I had a huge amount of power but no control over it so I was pushed through school to better harness my power.”

 

 

 

Chanyeol interjects. “His power used to be based off his emotions so he’s had to learn to control himself and basically relearn how to use his power.”

 

 

 

“That’s pretty impressive actually.” You reply.

 

 

 

Sehun actually smiles at that. “I like her too, for now. Nice to meet you.” He nods then also heads to his seat.

 

 

 

Chanyeol smiles warmly. “He caused himself a lot of harm while he was learning. Lay, you haven’t met him yet but he’s proficient in healing, had to patch him and quite a few of us up on several occasions. He seems cold and aloof but he needs to be in order to keep his ability at a safe level.”

 

 

 

“Thanks for introducing me, that’s 6 of you I’ve met so far so I still have 3 to go? Lay being one of them. Who are the other 2?”

 

 

 

You hear the groan in his voice. Clearly he isn’t a fan of these two. “Chen & Baekhyun. They are probably the two who will give you the most grief. Too clever for their own good and they are sneaky as all hell. They control lightning & light. Don’t be fooled by their lost puppy eyes. In fact, ask some of the other aides, I’m sure they have stories.” He glances up as the teacher enters the room and ducks off to his seat.

 

 

 

You’re left to wonder about these two supposed wicked students. What do they look like? (Probably should have asked that in hindsight) Are they really that charming? Had the other aides exaggerated with their stories? You were going to find one after class and learn more about these two. You wanted to be prepared for whenever they decided to show up in your vicinity.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

“Baekhyun? Is he here?!” The aide shuts the door quickly, looking around the room frantically.

 

 

 

“Woah, woah, calm down. He’s not here. I was just asking about him.” You try to calm the spooked aide. Christ what did this student do to the aides?

 

 

 

“What did he do to you?” She asks quietly.

 

 

 

“Huh? Nothing. I haven’t met him yet.”

 

 

 

“Keep it that way.” She says quickly.

 

 

 

“The better question is what did he do to _you?_ ” You take a step towards the aide, determined to get answers. She seems truly afraid of this student. Is she vehemently against magic? Yes. Does that warrant this level of fear? You’re not sure.

 

 

 

“He’s evil.” She whispers.

 

 

 

You roll your eyes. “Come on now. I know you aren’t exactly pro magic but evil? In what way?”

 

 

 

Her eyes widen as she grabs the fabric of your shirt over your shoulders. “He toys with you. He’ll be the sweetest student you ever meet until you do something that he doesn’t like. Then he’s your worst nightmare.”

 

 

 

“So a teenager with an out of control ego. That’s not so bad. You had me thinking he’d be murdering kittens on my doorstep or something.”

 

 

 

She shakes her head. “You don’t _understand!_ He’s proficient in light, sounds lame right?” Maybe it sounded lame to her but you had already put some thought into that power. Manipulating light and dark, controlling shadows - that could be a terrifying power. “It sounds like a nothing proficiency compared to the others but once you realise that light is necessary to everything, it becomes terrifying. He shouldn’t be.” She shudders.

 

 

 

_Maybe that attitude is why he doesn’t like you._ You think to yourself. Out loud, you attempt to change the subject. “And Chen?”

 

 

 

She scoffs. “He’s a trickster but there is no malice in what he does. He messes with you because he can. Compared to the other one, he’s harmless.”

 

 

 

You bid her farewell and head back towards your room. Another aide stops you down the corridor. “He knew she had a fear of the dark so he manipulated the shadows so that she felt like she was perpetually being engulfed in darkness for the better part of a month. She’s been a nervous wreck around him ever since. All because he didn’t score higher than Kai in class.”

 

 

 

“He sounds like a right jerk.” You state.

 

 

 

“He is. He’s ruthless once he’s decided that you aren’t useful to him anymore. The others are all probably like this but he’s the only one not hiding what an evil monster he and his kind truly are.” The aide leaves before you can give him a piece of your mind. Armed with more information on the remaining two proficient students than you’d had an hour ago, you head back to your room. Lost in thought you fail to notice a student the student that brushes past you.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

The rest of your day goes smoothly. You attend two more classes and are given homework to mark for each. Sehun comes to you for tutoring after his magical law class. He’d told you he understood the concepts they’d covered but didn’t understand why any of it mattered. You’d done your best to explain the notion of risk and consequence in relation to magical law, using his own grasp on his proficiency as an example. Once he left another student came knocking on your door, one you hadn’t been introduced to yet.

 

 

 

“Are you a senior?” You asked.

 

 

 

He nodded. “You’re our new aide.”

 

 

 

“Your powers of observation are second to none.”

 

 

 

“Hey now, that’s not how you should talk to students!” He exclaimed as he entered the room. You’d figured that he was one of the 3 remaining seniors you were yet to meet, you just didn’t know which one he was. The upturned shape of his mouth screamed ‘I’m mischief incarnate’ so you ruled out Lay.

 

 

 

“Most students would announce themselves upon arrival. Forgive me, I don’t believe we’ve been introduced yet.” You don’t hold out your hand, a tip you were heeding since Xiumin mentioned it.

 

 

 

“I’m Chen and I suck at apothecary. Please help me teacher-nim. I need to be in the top tier of the class so that my parents will get off my back.” He dramatically drops to his knees and overacts begging for help, making you laugh loudly.

 

 

 

“Get up, dear lord. Chen… lightning proficiency right?” He nods. “Do you just invoke it or can you direct it wherever you want it to go?” You ask.

 

 

 

Instead of answering he flicks his wrist and a small electric shock strikes your thumb. It’s similar to when you get a shock from your car or if you touch something after shuffling on carpet. You look up at him to see him smirking. “I can control it, and make it as strong or as delicate as I please.” He waggles his eyebrows at you.

 

 

 

You choose to ignore what he’s implying and continue to question him. “Just lightning or all electrical currents?”

 

 

 

“Oooh we have a smart one this time. Everyone else tried to work out my proficiency based off norse mythology.” He grins, that smile as disarming as you expected it to be.

 

 

 

“Oh please, you’re more shock mouse than god of thunder.” You blurt out. “Though I hear that you aren’t dissimilar to another norse god - Loki.”

 

 

 

He laughs loudly, the sound is music to your ears. “You are not what I was expecting but I’m not mad about it yet.” He settles into a seat at the desk across from you. “But seriously, I need help with this class. Can we work on that now and exchange smartass lines at each other later?”

 

 

 

You laugh and nod, settling back into teacher mode. So far Chen doesn’t seem as bad as the reputation that preceded him but you make sure to keep your wits about you. You know one thing for certain though, this student is a tragic flirt.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

You’re exhausted after the extra tutoring sessions and the marking. Your bed has never looked so inviting and you cannot wait to slide under the covers and drift off to dreamland. Your alarm had rather rudely pulled you from a particularly salacious dream last night and you were hoping to return to it tonight. You packed away all of your stuff, making sure to lock the students work in your private office. You’d been informed that there was a nullify spell over the room which rendered everyone’s skills, no matter how proficient, useless. Once you were done packing up you made your way to your bathroom to wash up for the night, taking your time to complete your skincare routine and brushing your teeth.

 

 

 

You refrain from rushing to your bed because you are not a child but a sigh of pure joy escapes your lips once you finally crawl under the covers. You think back to the dream you had left this morning and sink into the pillows, closing your eyes. The image of the log cabin in the snow coming back into view. You feel the cozy warmth of the blanket wrapped around you as you wait for him to return. He’d gone to fetch more hot chocolate and sweets so that you could finish watching the movie you’d started just over an hour ago.

 

 

 

Vaguely you recalled him being more built in this mornings dream but as long as he was bringing you sugar who were you to judge. What did alarm you was the sudden change in sensation of the blanket against your skin. Before you felt cozy as it had warmed your clothes but now you could feel it against your skin. When had you suddenly become naked?

 

 

 

Then he appeared. He didn’t look as sweet as you recalled. Rather, he looked annoyed for a fraction of a second before his face transformed, a kind expression now showing on it as he climbed back onto the bed next to you and handed you a mug of the aforementioned hot chocolate and placed a bowl of sweets in front of you. “Thanks babe.” You smiled as you picked up a toffee and put it in your mouth.

 

 

 

“You’re welcome.” The words sounded forced. Like he didn’t want to say them.

 

 

 

You do your best to ignore it and continue watching the movie as you sip your drink. You feel like he’s staring at you and not in a ‘I want to kiss every inch of you before I ravage you’ kind of way. “What?” You ask as you look at him.

 

 

 

“Really? _‘You taste like fucking candy?’_ That is the smooth line your subconscious came up with? You need to get out more.” His tone is full of judgement and disgust.

 

 

 

“What?! What are you talking about?” You exclaim, confused. This dream isn’t like the one you wanted to return to.

 

 

 

“In your mind we keep watching this movie and then I lean in to kiss you and say that line.”His judgemental tone is really starting to grate on you.

 

 

 

“Who the fuck are you?” You ask exasperatedly.

 

 

 

“I really thought you were smarter than this.” He chides as he gestures to himself as though he’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. “I’m Baekhyun.”

 

 

 

“What the fuck are you doing in my head? I’ve never even met you!” You clutch the blanket around you as you remember your nakedness. Was this still a dream? It felt a little too real to be a dream. There were details missing and if you were dreaming up Baekhyun then you needed to have some stern words with your subconcious about cockblocking you. The dream was supposed to start cringeworthy and saccharine sweet but then twist into a filthy romp. You knew the lines were cheesy, _but they were supposed to be_. It wasn’t so sweet when your face was planted into the rug about 20 minutes from now.

 

 

 

He shrugs. “I’ve had no reason to seek you out in person, not with everyone painting me as some sort of antichrist to you.”

 

 

 

“So what? You just decided you’d appear in my dream?” You choose to go with this no longer being your dream. You figure that he’s somehow invaded it and that alone is pissing you the hell off.

 

 

 

“I wanted to see what you were like and my proficiency allows me to do this so I figured ‘what the hell’ and popped over for a visit.” He grimaces. “I was not expecting ‘I’ve come to clean ze pool’ levels of dialogue though.”

 

 

 

You close your eyes and shake your head. “You need to get out of my dreams. I didn’t fucking invite you here.” It dawns on you that he must be able to dream walk and that thought somewhat terrifies you. Suddenly the frantic fear that the other aide had doesn’t seem so dramatic.

 

 

 

“Push me out then. Consider this a lesson in defense against wizards. Your mental barriers are weak. I can see _everything_.” He leans against the wall of the cabin as though he hasn’t a care in the world. You don’t have a clue at how to push him out because why would you? You try to imagine kicking him out of your head and locking a door behind you but he simple laughs at you. You try visualising a vault, and locking away your precious thoughts and memories, slowly filling the vault with more and more items.

 

 

 

He laughs. “Oh you are tragic. I thought the candy line was bad but this, this is just ripped from a poorly written romance novel. ‘I was just hoping that y’know… you’d fall in love with me.’ Excuse me while I barf.”

 

 

 

“Fuck you.” You grumble. You are going to evict this smug prick from your mind if its the last thing you do.

 

 

 

He looks you up and down and smirks. “Non-gifted aren’t usually my thing but I’d make an exception for you.” He winks. “The bit after all of the terrible dialogue isn’t so bad now that I look forward. My, my, you are _filthy_.”

 

 

 

You want to punch him.


	23. Nectar of the Gods

**Prompt: Yoongi + “Not interested, thanks.” + “You’re lucky you’re cute because your taste in music is awful.”**

**Setting/AU: Coffee Shop**

**Warnings: None** **  
**

**Word Count: 2,003**

“No.” 

 

 

“Oh come on! No one else has a problem changing the station for me.” Your tone grew exasperated. You’d been at this for the past ten minutes and the green haired barista was not giving in. It was half your luck that he was working today. He didn’t normally take the morning shift on a Wednesday. You knew this because you practically lived in this cafe while you were working on your thesis. It didn’t have the best coffee but its baristas, present company excluded, were kind and let you take over the radio if you were having a rough morning.

 

 

“I do.” He was the only one who seemed hell bent on keeping you in a terrible mood. In fact, you were pretty sure he got some sick kind of amusement out of seeing you suffer.

 

 

“Why? There’s no customers in here. What’s the problem?” A reasonable question. You’d understand if the place was packed and they wanted to keep the easy listening going for the clientele but you were the only customer in the joint. The morning rush had long since passed so you had an easy hour and a half before the brunch and early lunch crowd started to trickle in. A sane person might tell you that you spent too much time here but luckily for you everyone was in the midst of hell week.

 

 

He shot you a look that wouldn’t be out of place on a soccer mum who was about to list out the reasons why her child deserved to be picked first for the team. You’d laugh if you weren’t so stressed. “Firstly, you don’t get to make demands and second, I’m listening to it.” He continued to clean and stack the cups and mugs behind the counter, looking a cool as a cucumber - the pun not lost on you - and not at all like the goddamned gatekeeper to your sanity who was testing your very last nerve.

 

 

You had three days to get this final edit done. _Three days_ before you had to submit your thesis and today of all days was the day where your mind, having been overworked to its absolute limit, had decided to check the fuck out. You couldn’t concentrate on the words you were reading. Not over the inane noise that was coming from the speakers in the cafe. Any other staff member would have acquiesced and relieved you of your pain but not ol’ grumble mcdickface. Not your most original nickname but you were stressed. “You’re a _jerk_ Min Yoongi you know that?”

 

 

He put the mug he was wiping down and laid his palms flat on the counter as he sighed with irritation. Like he was sick of this exchange and just wished that you didn’t exist or that he wasn’t stuck with you at this exact moment in time. “And you’ve become an entitled little shit. Now do you want your usual or not?”

 

 

Your kryptonite. Caffeine. You damned higher beings that you didn’t even believe in as your shoulders slumped. This cafe might not make the best coffee but of all of the baristas Yoongi was the most skilled. You kind of hated him for it, which he was well aware of. He didn’t even wait for you to give in and ask for your usual, he simply started making it. You grumbled “I should find another coffee shop, one who has polite employees.”

 

 

He didn’t miss a beat. “Caffiends is down the road. I ain’t stopping you from leaving.” He paused as he poured milk into a steel jug. “It lacks baristas who will call you out on your bullshit, seems like a dull alternative to me.”

 

 

If you were less stressed you might have picked up on the flirtatious teasing but you were too far gone. All you heard was cruel words and you just couldn’t bring yourself to engage with him any further. Your last coffee was over an hour ago and you were craving your next cup already. “Just. Give me my damned coffee. If you aren’t going to help me get through my final thesis edit 3 days before I have to submit it by changing the music then don’t withhold caffeine from me as well. That’s a human rights violation.”

 

 

He scoffed as he finished making your usual. “You aren’t the only one in the middle of hell week so no special privileges. I’m only here because Namjoon has a philosophy thesis due.” He slid your drink across the counter, ringing it up so that you could pay for it.

 

 

You didn’t even thank him, merely groaned something incoherent and trudged back to your table. Back to your own little bubble of thesis hell.

 

 

***

 

 

By lunch time you had only progressed a few pages. The weird mix of soft ballads and hip hop kept pulling your focus, to the point that you’d started to imagine jumping over the counter and smashing the laptop that was streaming the music.

 

 

The two of you might not get along but you couldn’t fault Yoongi for letting your caffeine buzz wear off. He made sure that your cup got refilled, even at the height of the lunch rush. He’d just silently appear with a fresh cup for you, place it on your table and clear the empty one.

 

 

At some point, you weren’t even sure _when_ it happened, Hanbin - who you’d had the misfortune of being paired with during a particularly painful forensic science class last year - sat down next to you. If he saw the momentary look of shock and discomfort that made its way across your features when you finally noticed him sitting there, he didn’t show it.

 

 

“How is hell week treating you babe?” Memories came flooding back to you. Memories of him using pet names every time he spoke to you, of how he’d introduce himself as your partner to anyone you ran into on campus or while you were working together. You hated this guy. He just didn’t understand that you had zero interest in him and that he made you uncomfortable. Even when you’d told him so. He’d just called you funny.

 

 

“The same way I’m sure it’s treating everyone Hanbin.” You said icily. “How long have you been sitting here?”

 

 

“Woah, you must be really out of it doll.” He laughed. “I got here like five minutes ago. _Did you seriously only just notice me now?_ ” He feigned hurt. “My feelings should feel hurt.”

 

 

“And what? You figured ‘Hey I know I’ll just sit here and stare’ like that’s not incredibly _creepy_?” You snapped.

 

 

“Aw c’mon now babe. You know I’m not being creepy. You’re just so cute, how could I _not_ look at you?” The saccharine tone he was using repulsed you. You’d been having a crap day before Hanbin turned up, yet it was safe to say that it was now infinitely worse. Before you’d been unable to focus on the words in front of you. Now, you just wanted to drive a fork through his stupid face since no matter how many times you told him you weren’t interested or how uncomfortable he made you feel, he never stopped.

 

 

A hand gripped your shoulder lightly as a coffee cup was placed in front of you. You looked up to see Yoongi reaching over you, something he’d never done before, in order to put a fresh coffee in front of you. His gaze was stony as he stared at Hanbin, with his stupid grin on his face, before turning to you, his hand squeezing your shoulder. “Hey, sorry. I know you told me earlier but with the lunch rush I simply forgot. What channel did you want me to change it to?”

 

 

You’d never heard this tone from Yoongi before. He sounded…. kind? polite? The fuck was going on? You had no idea what was going on but you weren’t going to pass up the chance to get the music you needed playing. You’d be able to get rid of Hanbin soon enough. “1990’s/2000’s Grunge and Rock.” You smiled up at him. He patted your shoulder and cleared your empty cup then headed back behind the counter, changing the music for you.

 

 

You’d decided that you’d either had a mental breakdown or you were having some weird dream because never in your wildest imagination would Yoongi ever yield and change the music for you. Never. In fact, he’d told you that it could be your last dying wish and he’d still refuse. Yet for some reason beyond your comprehension he’d done just that.

 

 

You were working overtime to get rid of Hanbin but he seemed set on building up to asking you out and would not leave until he’d wasted enough of your day while he built up the nerve to ask. It was an act, he had the nerve but he felt the need to pretend like he didn’t. God you hated him.

 

 

“So what do you say doll? Let me take you out once hell week is over. I’ll treat you re-”

 

 

“Not interested, thanks.”

 

 

They were the words you wanted to say but a different voice said them before you could. Behind you Yoongi stood with his arms crossed as he stared down at Hanbin.

 

 

“Dude, I wasn’t asking you. FYI.” He scoffed.

 

 

Yoongi sighed. You knew that sigh. It was usually directed at you if your bickering extended past ten minutes. It usually resulted in him handing you a takeaway cup, a subtle way of telling you to fuck off and leave. “I don’t know who you are,” He held up his hand as Hanbin moved to speak. “And frankly I don’t care but you are disturbing a customer of mine while she is trying to finish her thesis. More so, you have not ordered anything and this establishment is not for loitering. So, whatever it is that you are offering, she’s not interested. All she’s interested in is you leaving so that she can finish her work.” When Hanbin made no moves to leave Yoongi continued. “ _Oh did I not make myself clear?_ You have exactly ten seconds to get out of my cafe before I call the cops to have you removed. You’re done here.”

 

 

You stared at Yoongi silently and sipped your coffee, not making any eye contact with Hanbin. You figured if he couldn’t get your attention then he’d give up and leave. He was never one to handle having his fragile masculinity challenged in the way Yoongi was doing right now. After a pregnant silence and a muttering of “Dude, don’t make me count. Don’t be that guy.” you heard the sound of a chair scraping and footsteps retreating, followed by the chime of the door as Hanbin exited.

 

 

“Why’d you do that?” You asked.

 

 

Yoongi tilted his head as he looked down at you. “Well _sweetheart, babe, doll._ I got sick of hearing your bitchy tone telling him no repeatedly. He either doesn’t care that you said no or he’s a sociopath and I have no plans on my cafe being on the front page as the last place you were seen alive.”

 

 

You scoffed. “He’s never taken no for an answer. He’s a fucking creep.” You paused. “I guess I should thank you.”

 

 

“That would be the polite thing to do.”

 

 

“Thanks Yoongi.” You almost had to force the words out. You were genuinely thankful to him but saying the words out loud was another story. It felt weird, and foreign. You were used to fighting, bickering, and exchanging insults with this man, not feeling thankful and kind towards him.

 

 

He laughed and shook his head. “Next time you could try looking less like you’re thanking me for killing your cat and more like you actually mean it.”

 

 

“Fuck you Yoongi.” You chuckled as he got up and went back to the counter.

 

 

Ten minutes later you heard him complain. “You’re lucky you’re cute because your taste in music is awful.”


	24. Unusual Suspects

**Prompt: Minseok (feat Baekhyun, sorrynotsorry) + “You taste like fucking candy.” + “You heard me. Take it off.”**

**Setting/AU: Vampire**

**Warnings: it’s kind of a crack drabble, mentions of blood & death, supernatural themes, swearing, standard vampire stuff, implied smut.**

**Word Count: 2366**

**A/N: Again, sorry this took so long anon, I hope you enjoy it. The idea was originally going to be a witch/wizard au but the vampire one came to me after seeing[this](https://xiubaek13.tumblr.com/private/182577980685/tumblr_pmge74dyNu1w1wkvi) prompt and I kept laughing about it so I had to make it happen.   
**

*****  
**

_Knock knock._

 

 

You groan from underneath the pillow you’d put over your head in an attempt to block out the incessant knocking at your front door. Who the fuck door knocks at this time of night? You sleepily grabbed your phone, the screen illuminating, temporarily blinding you while showing you the ungodly hour of 3am. _  
_

_Knock knock._

 

 

Three in the fucking morning. You had no missed calls, unread messages or anything to indicate that someone needed you, and really, if they needed you then odds were that they also knew where your spare key was kept and would just let themselves in. 

_Knock knock._

 

 

You threw the covers off in a huff, half asleep, barely human and 100% pissed off - like a cat when it has to have a bath. You got up and stumbled to the door, your equilibrium not quite caught up to the fact that your body was upright and moving. You did pretty well to only fall into the wall twice.   

 

 

Your hair was a mess and you probably had drool on your face but those were things that alert people considered, not abruptly awoken in the middle of the goddamned night people. Those people only had three thoughts - Do I need to pee? Who do I kill for waking me? And Can I go back to sleep now?. You flung the door open - again, alert people would probably have some sense of self preservation and maybe not open the door at 3am to complete strangers - and grumpily sized up the two people in front of you. _Why the fuck did they look so pleasant and AWAKE?_ The two men in front of you seemed pleasantly surprised that you’d opened the door.

 

 

They didn’t look at you like they’d spent the better part of fifteen minutes knocking on your front door, no they looked like the picture perfect missionaries who usually woke you up (at a much more reasonable hour of 8 or 9am). One wore white, the other wore black. Both had black hair, styled more than your standard missionary would have theirs but who knew what the hell these two did given they were knocking on your goddamned door at 3am, maybe they were a bit vain, you didn’t care. They looked rather harmless to you in your current state. The only thing that stood out were their eyes, those were far too intense for your standard missionaries, even your barely awake, murderous self could see that. Still, there were people knocking on your door at 3am who looked poised to try and sell you on the word of god and you were not having it. Jesus would want you to be well rested if he expected you to follow the thou shalt not murder commandment.

 

 

All you wanted was to go back to bed and be left alone. 3am was not  time for a conversation on your doorstep. You wanted them gone, the sooner the better. “Seriously, what the hell do yo-”

 

 

The one in white smiled sweetly at you as he stepped forward and asked. “Hello! Do you have a minute to talk about Dracula?”

 

 

You couldn’t believe you were about to shut down the messengers of god this early in the morning but here you were. Normally you played along then gave some witty remark about making a deal with a crossroads demon or telling them that you were actually the antichrist, or that you were waiting for your human sacrifice to turn up. Those were always post coffee conversations, when your wit was less bitchy. These two weren’t getting any of that treatment today. No, you were going to keep it short and sweet. A simple ‘no’ then you could close the door and go back to bed. “No- wait, Dracula?” Well _that_ was unexpected. It did explain the stupid hour of the day though.

 

 

“Yes!” The one in black stepped forward as well, smiling warmly, happy that you’d basically recanted your rejection of their presence.

 

 

“You’re vampires?” You asked. You weren’t quite awake enough to remember two very, very important things. 1. Vampires were not real and 2. If they were by some weird twist of fate, actually real vampires, then you most definitely should not invite them in. You should close the door, go back to bed and sleep it off. You didn’t do that though, instead opting to rub your eyes and take a proper look at these alleged vampires. The one in white was slightly taller than the other. He had broad shoulders, dark tousled hair, khol lined eyes & a lean body. Everything about him appealed to you, which made sense if you were to believe that he was a creature of the night. You could happily ogle him for hours but you mind reminded you that a) it was rude to stare and b) there was another man for you to roam your eyes over. You stared at him unabashedly which didn’t seem to unnerve him, if anything it interested him. He was only slightly taller than you, with dark hair that fell into his feline eyes, which were also lined, but with a smoky red liner. His black shirt clung to him and you could see that whilst he wasn’t as tall as his partner, he was muscular.

 

 

As you stared at the two men the one in black smirked at you and spoke softly. “Yes. We have pamphlets.” As he spoke the other held out one of the aforementioned pamphlets in his delicate fingers. This whole encounter so far was utterly ludicrous.

 

 

You took it from him and flipped it over in your hands, confused as the logical part of your brain tried to get through to you. “Vampires have missionaries?” The concept seemed utterly stupid. Vampires were the fictional beasts from gothic horror. They were entities with powers that were almost unmatched, not quiet door to door missionaries like the pair standing in front of you. Still, you had questions. Even if they were scamming you, they had piqued your interest.

 

 

“Where else would new vampires come from?” The taller of the two asked, cocking his head to the side as he laughed lightly at your question like you were the one saying crazy outlandish things.

 

 

“I assumed you bit people.” You shrugged. If you were to believe the tales from your childhood, vampires - still fictional - created more of their kind by biting someone and draining them of their blood, and once the person was at death’s door they fed them some of their blood. Then they let them die. Once the victim died the blood in their system would raise them as a new baby vampire. The stories were always like this, some small variations existed here and there but what do semantics matter when the whole concept is fictional?

 

 

The shorter one frowned slightly at your response and nodded, clasping his hands behind him. “There are many harmful stereotypes. May we come in?”

 

 

“I guess.” Was your stupid answer, stupid because had you been more awake or even remotely concerned for your safety you would have never let two strangers into your home during the day, let alone at 3 in the goddamned morning. But the words fell out of your mouth before you could stop them. Not even five minutes ago you’d been ready to tell whoever was at your door exactly where they could go and/or what implement to shove up their own ass so that you could get yourself back into bed and back to sleep but here you were, stepping aside to let the two men (whose names you hadn’t bothered to ask because manners were also apparently not a thing right now) enter your home.

 

 

You led them to your kitchen and started to pour yourself a glass of juice. “Should I offer either of you a drink or is that a little on the nose?”

 

 

The taller one laughed and shook his head. “And she’s funny at 3am, I like her.”

 

 

“I must apologise for my partner. He appears to have forgotten his manners. My name is Xiumin & this is Baekhyun.” He inclined his head towards his partner who just seemed happy to be indoors.

 

 

“We don’t usually get this far to be honest. People usually say some rather crude things to us.” Baekhyun looked around the room, his eyes shining. “You have a lovely home.”

 

 

“Thanks? It’s a mess right now but it’s super early or super late, who the hell knows, and I wasn’t expecting guests.” You stifle a yawn as you vaguely gesture around the room.

 

 

Xiumin stepped forward, drawing your attention back to him. His sharp gaze held you in your spot as he smirked and closed the gap between the two of you. “You know, you really should be more careful. Letting two complete strangers into your home at any hour is a risk but in the dead of the night after they told you they were vampires? That’s downright stupid.”

 

 

You froze as you finally realised the position you were in. Whilst they weren’t hulking muscle pigs you were outnumbered and you were pretty sure they were still stronger than you. “The vampire thing is a joke though, right?” You half heartedly laughed. “I mean they aren’t real…”

 

 

You turned your head as you heard Baekhyun chuckle from across the room as he inspected some of the photos you had pinned to a board. He paused with a photo of you and your best friend in his hands and looked at you, his eyes darker and more menacing than before. “Oh my dear, vampires are very real. We’ve just had to _amend_ our methods of conversion over the years.” Your eyes widened in fear as you spotted his fangs as he spoke. “We figured it worked so well for the church over the years, so why not try it. We increase both our numbers and our real estate portfolio for every home we’re invited into.”

 

 

You were scared, there was no point in denying that fact, but the more time you spent with the two of them, the more comfortable you felt in their presence. The longer they spoke to you, the less terrified you became. You figured you’d try to keep them talking until that fear subsided a bit more. _Then_ you’d be able to work out a way out of this, negotiate with them or something.

 

 

You kept them talking, asking their answers to other common stereotypes associated with vampires. You figured they’d have to have them in case someone didn’t let them into their home but still wanted to talk. Their answers were so well formulated and convincing that it almost undid the two and a half decades of fear mongering you’d been fed. Almost. Twenty minutes later, you were still terrified and fearing for your life. You didn’t want to die yet, you still had recipes you wanted to make and what good were they if you couldn’t stomach food anymore? Would animals hate you if you were a vampire? You’d sooner die and have that be it than live out an existence where every dog and cat hated you.

 

 

You must have given a voice to those fears because you heard Baekhyun chuckle again as he moved back across the room towards you. “You shouldn’t be scared little one.” Xiumin sighed as he continued to stare at you. “We’ve been watching you and think that you’d make the _perfect_ addition to our little family. I promise, we’ll let you enjoy your time with us before we turn you. You’re less likely to hate us after if we show you how good one of our kind can make you feel.”

 

 

“And who said we have to turn you tonight?” Baekhyun added. “Darling, we have so much planned. We can take our time, work out all of these niggling human concerns of yours.” 

 

Xiumin held your face in his hands. “Tell me no after I kiss you and we’ll turn you now, but if you tell me yes then you’ll have a night that you won’t regret.” He attached his lips to yours. You felt the soft, plush lips against yours and strangely the fear you had started to dissipate. He didn’t force the kiss, seemingly waiting until you either pushed him away or made a move to show him you wanted to continue. Either way, you were going to die tonight. That much had been made clear. The choice had been made and there was no way you were going to be able to fend off two vampires and not die a horribly painful death. In the back of your mind your brain gave you two options, either die now or let them give you pleasure before dying. It even threw in the possibility that you were still dreaming and if you were dreaming then you’d obviously go for the option of sex with two hot vampires.

 

 

You settled on throwing caution to the wind, something you’d done a lot tonight, and responded to his movements allowing him to take your bottom lip between his teeth, his tongue swiping along it. He released your lip and kissed you again, this time deepening the kiss. He varied the pressure he applied, giving you soft kisses then deep hungry, breath stealing kisses. When you eventually broke the kiss you were panting as you tried to catch your breath. You meant to ask make a witty comment about how that was a bold move for a missionary but what came out of your mouth was more of a moan than words.

 

 

He trailed kisses from your mouth down to your neck, nipping and sucking at your flesh. “You taste like fucking candy.” He groaned into your shoulder as he momentarily stopped himself.

 

 

His voice was a low rasp and you thought he’d said something but you were too caught up in how his mouth felt against your skin and didn’t hear him. “Sorry what?”

 

 

“You heard me. Take it off.”


End file.
